IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Some people believe that it would be beneficial if employees worked three or four days per week rather than five or six days. Why is this? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#people #employees #three #four #week #five #six #answers
A 4 days
work
 at week, it is a really new concept of
work
 at the present time. Already some companies agree with
this
 type of working and accepted
this
 new system of working.
This
Change the determiner
These
show examples
 companies have experience with 4
day
Change to a plural noun
days
show examples
 of working and their success have
increase
Change the verb form
increased
show examples
 at
this
 period of time Working with
this
format
 have more benefits in
company
Add an article
the company
show examples
. It is related
with
Verify preposition usage
to
show examples
productivity
Add an article
the productivity
show examples
 of employment and
employees
.
This
 fact has been confirmed by professors of Stanford University.
Also
 overworking
employees
 are less productive. By working 40 hours
at
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
 week,
employee
Add an article
an employee
show examples
 of simple company damage his nervous system, due to
this
 problem
employee
 always was stressed and tired. Working over
this
condictions
Correct your spelling
conditions
condition
 will reduce
productivity
Add an article
the productivity
show examples
 of
employee
Add an article
the employee
an employee
show examples
. Considering
of
Verify preposition usage
apply
show examples
all of
this
Change the determiner
these
show examples
 facts,
in
addition
Add the comma(s)
,addition
show examples
employee
 has a good relationship with his family. 3 days of the week
employee
 can relax with his family,
this
 is a one of good bonus for
employee
Add an article
an employee
the employee
show examples
 to relieve stress, it
is
Change the verb form
also increases
show examples
also
increase
productivity
. By
this
Change the determiner
these
show examples
facts
Add a comma
,facts
show examples
 we can say that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 it is a good way to
increase
productivity
 inside
work
, but
this
format
 of working can give another result when employment
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
 a wrong approach.
Key
Add an article
A key
The key
show examples
 part of
this
format
 connected with hours of
work
 in
this
 4 day. Overloading of
employees
 can have a bad
consiquenses
Correct your spelling
consequences
consequence
.
This
 actions can lead to decreasing
of
Verify preposition usage
in
show examples
productivity
. In conclusion, I want to say that
this
format
 of
work
 can have a good effect on the
productivity
 of
work
. satisfied
employees
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and good results will
increase
 the company's income, but only on one condition, the main thing is to have the right approach to using
this
 method.
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • productive
  • workplace stress
  • employee well-being
  • employment opportunities
  • carbon emissions
  • traffic congestion
  • flexibility
  • personal interests
  • implementation
  • workload
  • customer service
  • business operations
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