Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time while others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both of these views and give your opinion. Give reasons & relevant examples.

#people #parents #children #part #group #activities #time

Education for

children

is one of the tough problems which all parents face. Some people believe that kids should have the organizing

ability

However

, others might say that self-controlled

ability

is much important. In

this

essay, I will elaborate on both sides with some consideration and give my own opinion about

this

issue. Some group of people seems to think that teaching

children

how to occupy themselves is much crucial. They hold the opinion that cooperation is not as significant as doing something alone because

children

can gain all knowledge and skill when they do something only by themselves, but if they cooperate with others, they may lose some knowledge from some aspects which respond by other students.

Consequently

, in order to let their

children

learn something much comprehensively, they trend to their

children

work alone.

In contrast

, there are various benefits that

children

can get from the

ability

to organize an activity orderly.

Firstly

this

ability

will help them to get the basic feature of being a good leader because, when someone plans an event, they need to consider the scheduler, communicate with people who will join

this

event, arranging the site, and so on. These complex matters require the organizer to be circumspection and sociability, which benefit

children

’s growth.

Furthermore

, being a host of an event

also

will promote the young to be conscientious because the feeling of holding an activity successfully is awesome.

This

welcome experience may facilitate them to be more responsible when they get satisfaction from the feeling above. In conclusion, as you may see, I believe that

children

spend more time on learning organising events is much valuable than just studying how to occupy themselves.

Submitted by Esther on Mon Feb 22 2021

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

encourage
occupied
organized
group activities
benefits
social
teamwork skills
interpersonal skills
friendship
discipline
time management
interests
hobbies
independent play
creativity
problem-solving skills
self-reliance
explore
discover

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Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe that it is possible for a country to be economically successful and have a clean environment. Others argue that these two aims are not compatible. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that schools should remove art classes and focus on more important subjects such as mathematics and science. Do the advantages of cutting art classes outweigh the disadvantages?

Many manufactured food and drink contains high level of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

It is believed that people should choose their jobs based on income in order to provide security for their families. Do you agree that salary is an important factor when choosing a job? What factors should be considered?