IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that improve the mind, such as reading and doing word puzzles. Other people feel that it is important to rest the mind during leisure time.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is true that using the mind
in
Correct your spelling
inactive
show examples
active
Change the article
an active
show examples
 way during the free
time
Use synonyms
 is very useful and brings a lot of benefits to the person, while other
people
Use synonyms
 tend towards the
view point
Correct your spelling
viewpoint
show examples
 that relaxing our
minds
Use synonyms
 in that
time
Use synonyms
 is very important. In my point of view,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 think that individuals should take the advantage of their free
time
Use synonyms
 and improve their
minds
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, there are clear arguments that
people
Use synonyms
 have to use their empty
time
Use synonyms
 working on enhancing their
minds
Use synonyms
 and do different
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
such
Linking Words
 as playing smart games and reading. One of the main reasons can be that during peoples' free
time
Use synonyms
 they could refresh their
minds
Use synonyms
 by knowing new information and they could increase the rate of
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 intelligence by gaining
knowledege
Correct your spelling
knowledge
. The
second
Linking Words
 point can be that individuals can finish and complete their postponed works through that
time
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
, they can use their
time
Use synonyms
 in useful ways.
For instance
Linking Words
, a recent poll showed that almost the majority of
people
Use synonyms
 used their
time
Use synonyms
 playing crosswords to raise their knowledge.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is
also
Linking Words
 possible to make the opposing case that relaxing your mind is the best method to use your leisure
time
Use synonyms
. Some
people
Use synonyms
 have
this
Linking Words
 opinion because they feel that free
time
Use synonyms
 is made only for relaxing and to take a rest. A particularly good example here is that
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 latest statistics gave data about the workers in offices hate to work or read in their free
time
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, while
people
Use synonyms
 may vary in their opinions,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 believe that improving
minds
Use synonyms
 during leisure
time
Use synonyms
 is extremely important.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cognitive abilities
  • mental stagnation
  • intellectually stimulating
  • relaxation
  • meditation
  • stress reduction
  • overall well-being
  • personal development
  • life satisfaction
  • sense of achievement
  • emotional balance
  • peace of mind
  • scientific evidence
  • memory
  • learning
  • creativity
  • emotional regulation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: