IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some organizations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#organizations #employees #dress #value #quality #work #appearance
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It is certainly true that workers should wear formal and perfect clothes during
work
Use synonyms
, while other institutions tend towards the viewpoint that the quality of
work
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 is more important than
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
apperance
Correct your spelling
appearance
. In my point of view, I would have to support the idea that
employees
Use synonyms
 should dress well
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
work
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, there are clear arguments that
people
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 must appear perfectly
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
work
Use synonyms
. One of the main reasons can be that it might increase the profile of the organization, which means that it will promote their incomes and popularity across the globe. Another reason could be that
employees
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 will
work
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 together in cooperative and convenient methods.
As a result
Linking Words
, the workers can love their jobs and the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
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organization will benefit
effective
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from effective
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 outcomes in the future.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the
employees
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 will feel that they are equal in treatments by their managers.
For instance
Linking Words
, there are many companies around the world
apply
Correct pronoun usage
that apply
show examples
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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uniform clothes on their
employees
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, so they can feel the similarity between each other without
discriminatio
Correct your spelling
discrimination
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is
also
Linking Words
 possible to make the opposing case that in fact, some
people
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 see that
work
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's quality is prevalent than how workers
are look
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look
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like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
.
People
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 usually have
this
Linking Words
 opinion because
apperance
Correct your spelling
appearance
 cannot lead to great results as the way of working or the transactions of the organizations can do.
This
Linking Words
 means that hardworking and managing time are
consider
Change the form of the verb
considered
show examples
 as
work
Use synonyms
 qualities. A particularly good example here is that many bosses evaluate their
employees
Use synonyms
 by the way of working more than how they dressed. In conclusion, while
people
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 may vary in their opinions, In my perspective, I think that individuals should look perfect during their labour.
Submitted by Mariam on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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