IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

When people move to another country, some of them decide to follow the customs of the new country. Others prefer to keep their own customs. Which one do you prefer? Support your answer with specific details.

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In our society, more and more
people
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 like travelling around the world. Among them, some
people
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 decide to move to another
country
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 by choice.
Others
Correct pronoun usage
Other
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people
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 move for the war of their
country
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 or any
reasons
Correct quantifier usage
other reasons
show examples
. Whatever the reasons for the change, each of them will have to adapt
into
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to
show examples
 a new
invironment
Correct your spelling
environment
 . Some will certainly follow
new
Correct article usage
the new
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customs
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 of the new
country
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. Others will keep their own
customs
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. From my point of view,
people
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 who keep their own
customs
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,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
do it because they want to remember
ancestors
Correct pronoun usage
their ancestors
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. If they have
a
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apply
show examples
children, it's the best way to teach them our
customs
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 and so that their
customs
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 will be passed down from generation to generation.
This
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also
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 allows their new
neighbors
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neighbours
show examples
 to discover about their
country
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 and its origins.
On the other hand
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, certain
people
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 choose to follow the new
customs
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.
This
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 choice provides a better and faster way to adapt to
inside
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the local population.
Secondly
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, the
people
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 who live with the new habits will have a better understanding of
discovered
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discovering
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 a new culture and better comprehension. If I have the possible opportunity to live in another
country
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, I would choose to keep the
customs
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. In my
opion
Correct your spelling
opinion
, keeping
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
customs
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 is a part of my life. I have grown up with traditional
customs
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 and
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 can't leave my life.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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