IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

When people move to another country, some of them decide to follow the customs of the new country. Others prefer to keep their own customs. Which one do you prefer? Support your answer with specific details.

#people #move #country #customs #support
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In our society, more and more
people
 like travelling around the world. Among them, some
people
 decide to move to another
country
 by choice.
Others
Correct pronoun usage
Other
show examples
people
 move for the war of their
country
 or any
reasons
Correct quantifier usage
other reasons
show examples
. Whatever the reasons for the change, each of them will have to adapt
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a new
invironment
Correct your spelling
environment
 . Some will certainly follow
new
Correct article usage
the new
show examples
customs
 of the new
country
. Others will keep their own
customs
. From my point of view,
people
 who keep their own
customs
,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
do it because they want to remember
ancestors
Correct pronoun usage
their ancestors
show examples
. If they have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children, it's the best way to teach them our
customs
 and so that their
customs
 will be passed down from generation to generation.
This
also
 allows their new
neighbors
Change the spelling
neighbours
show examples
 to discover about their
country
 and its origins.
On the other hand
, certain
people
 choose to follow the new
customs
.
This
 choice provides a better and faster way to adapt to
inside
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the local population.
Secondly
, the
people
 who live with the new habits will have a better understanding of
discovered
Change the form of the verb
discovering
show examples
 a new culture and better comprehension. If I have the possible opportunity to live in another
country
, I would choose to keep the
customs
. In my
opion
Correct your spelling
opinion
, keeping
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
customs
 is a part of my life. I have grown up with traditional
customs
 and
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 can't leave my life.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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