Parents should encourage children to spend less time studying and more time doing physical activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#parents #children #time #activities

Exercise is always playing a vital role in

humans

Change the noun form

human

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life.It is believed that parents should encourage offspring to invest less time

Change preposition

in academic

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academic

Fix the agreement mistake

academics

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and more time devoted to strong

workout

Fix the agreement mistake

workouts

show examples

.I completely

accord

Verb problem

agree

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with

this

statement and the reasons for my opinion will be elucidated in forthcoming paragraphs with relevant illustrations. To commence with, why guardians need to encourage their juveniles to spend more time in body

workout

Fix the agreement mistake

workouts

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, the reason behind

Correct pronoun usage

this is

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that children always live fit if they do more focus on

the

Correct article usage

apply

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exercise and never survive with any health

issue

Fix the agreement mistake

issues

show examples

For example

, everyone knows that education is very significant for pupils.

However

, if students participate in any sports

activities

, the former could not find any difficulty with a medical issue.

Moreover

, if the person

will

Verb problem

show examples

not fit

then

it is not possible for him to give an examination if he or she suffering from a fever To add more, children should participate in sports

activities

Due to

the

fact

Add a comma

fact,

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they could learn many things from there

such

as discipline, communication

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

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and team spirit.

For instance

, cricket has 11 members of the team.Everyone knows their own responsibilities over there.People can learn how to play with teamwork and how to stay calm in any circumstances.

Apart from

this

,it will help to expand their friend circle.

Therefore

, paying attention to strong exercise

always

Add a missing verb

is always

show examples

crucial in

humans

Fix the agreement mistake

human

show examples

lives.

To conclude

, owing to the reasons

such

as children always live fit, fine and strong with the body

activities

and always learn teamwork and more socialize in their life.I am in favour of who opine parents should motivate to their wards to do more focus on physical strength

activities

Submitted by mr.gouravmahajan on Sun Apr 25 2021

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task response

Develop your main points more clearly and provide relevant examples to support your arguments.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of your essay needs improvement. Ensure your introduction and conclusion are clear and make sure there is coherence between your ideas.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

268 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Physical activity
Development
Concentration
Obesity
Burnout
Sedentary lifestyle
Healthy lifestyle
Intellectual development
Structured activities
Teamwork
Leadership
Sedentary behavior
Tech addiction
Role models
Family bonds

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Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skills and more creativity than reading. To what extent do you agree? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.