IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The future, the main reason for going to shopping mall will be for entertainment, not to shop. Do you agree or disagree.

#future #reason #mall #entertainment #shop
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In
this
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 modern era, most
people
Use synonyms
 are addicted through shopping habit. Today generation is only changed shopping is one kind of entertainment compared to ever before.
However
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, a fair amount of
people
Use synonyms
 think that in the future
people
Use synonyms
 will go to
shopping
Add an article
the shopping
show examples
mall
Use synonyms
 will get entertainment but not to shop. I strongly agree with
this
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 statement for various reasons
such
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 as stress
relax
Replace the word
relaxation
show examples
 and getting fun. I will
discusses
Change the verb form
discuss
show examples
in
Correct pronoun usage
this in
show examples
 details in the upcoming paragraphs.
To begin
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 with, the main reason is the future
people
Use synonyms
 will go to
shopping
Add an article
the shopping
a shopping
show examples
mall
Use synonyms
 for will reduce their stress level because
this
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 kind of place will provide more happiness and
enthusiasim
Correct your spelling
enthusiasm
therefore
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,
this
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mall
Use synonyms
 will
attarct
Correct your spelling
attract
 more folks in different kinds of facilities
such
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 as
Cinima
Correct your spelling
Cinema
 hall,
Acquarium
Correct your spelling
Aquarium
,
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
children's
 playing indoor activity games.
For example
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,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
India
capital
Correct article usage
the capital
show examples
 city which is New Delhi has more shopping
mall
Use synonyms
 with seven floors but
grand
Correct article usage
the grand
show examples
 floor only available for shopping
goods
Use synonyms
 other remaining floors are available for entertainment-purpose
such
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 as
Theature
Correct your spelling
Theatre
, book
exibihition
Correct your spelling
exhibition
 and etc.
Moreover
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, another main reason is taking fun from shopping
mall
Use synonyms
 due to technology because in the
next
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 generation folks will purchase all kinds of
goods
Use synonyms
 from online platform
therefore
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, they will not go to
Use synonyms
mall
Add an article
the mall
show examples
 for
shop
Add an article
the shop
a shop
show examples
this
Linking Words
 means they will go for taking fun-oriented
such
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 as playing indoor games and participating any cultural activity.
For instance
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, a recent survey said that most shopping malls are closing due to the folks expect more from the
mall
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as not only for
goods
Use synonyms
 but
also
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 needs some leisure activity
as a result
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, some malls are closed when without satisfying their customer needs and wants. To conclude, in the
next
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 year community will go to
shopping
Add an article
the shopping
a shopping
show examples
mall
Use synonyms
 for taking fun and enjoying themselves.
Besides
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, they will never go
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 purchase the
goods
Use synonyms
 in
shooping
Correct your spelling
shopping
 malls. I hope
this
Linking Words
 situation will increase automatically because the community expectation
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 not stable often will flexible.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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