some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a good job straight after school. Discuss both view and give your opinion

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to achieve a good successful career, It
is believe
Change the verb form
is believed
show examples
that going the
university
Use synonyms
or college is the best route. While getting a good straight after school is
also
Linking Words
a good idea.
Linking Words
This
Change preposition
In this
show examples
essay I would tend to
studying
Change the verb form
study
show examples
at
university
Use synonyms
or college . On the one hand, there are several reasons why
people
Use synonyms
think that starting
work
Use synonyms
straight after school is a great option.
Firstly
Linking Words
, young
people
Use synonyms
will have
work
Use synonyms
experience, it means they have time to strengthen their skill.
Moreover
Linking Words
, young workers have the ability to deal with disgruntled customers politely. It is
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
Linking Words
may agree that company will pay attention to staff working experience and heighten their future.
Secondly
Linking Words
, many young
people
Use synonyms
who decide to find
work
Use synonyms
, rather than continue their study may save their money. Because there are some schools have a high fee which
exceed
Change the verb form
exceeds
show examples
their financial level. If they choose
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
suitable major, they might not need to go to the
university
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, I believe that the option to continue studying is
me
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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benifical
Correct your spelling
beneficial
.
First
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of all, learning more and more let them have a deeper
about
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apply
show examples
level
Add an article
the level
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of expertise.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, it might enhance the income than the others who do not have.
For example
Linking Words
, a technologist has a significant income. meanwhile, an individual who
Use synonyms
work
Change the verb form
works
show examples
as
employee
Add an article
an employee
show examples
get
Change the verb form
gets
show examples
a lower one.
The
Correct article usage
Second
show examples
second
Linking Words
, companies demand
people
Use synonyms
with high education. The job market is
becomming
Correct your spelling
becoming
increasingly competitive.
Therefore
Linking Words
, if our dreamwork
require
Change the verb form
requires
show examples
that we have to get
Master's
Correct article usage
a Master's
show examples
degree, continuing studying is completely correct.
For instance
Linking Words
, to qualify for lecture positions at
Malaysia
Replace the word
Malaysian
show examples
public
university
Use synonyms
,
MA
Correct article usage
an MA
show examples
degree is an
indispensible
Correct your spelling
indispensable
level. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
it is partly true that going to
work
Use synonyms
straight after school in some cases, I still support the view that continuing learning at the
university
Use synonyms
aor
Correct your spelling
or
for
college
Submitted by Ngô Yên Vy on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Academic qualifications
  • Specialized skills
  • In-depth knowledge
  • Personal growth
  • Social development
  • Practical experience
  • Financial independence
  • Career progression
  • Professional networking
  • Education
  • Work experience
  • Successful career
  • Personal interests
  • Career goals
  • Decision-making process
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