Some people think that puplic health is a the responsibility of the government while others think people should be responsible for their own health. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

#people #puplic #health #responsibility #government

Everyone desire better

health

, the majority of

people

believe that public

healh

Correct your spelling

health

is an accountability of the

government

whilst others consider every

people

accountable for their own

health

. In my

opinoin

Correct your spelling

opinion

, both views are relevant. On the one hand ,

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

should be

care

Replace the word

careful

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

people

many-sided

also

Change preposition

for

show examples

public

health

. Since

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

is consisting of

people

. If

people

die more ,

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

also

die.

Therefore

authority

establish

Change the verb form

establishes

show examples

some rules in order to maintain public

health

As a

Change preposition

show examples

prime example of

this

could be Covid-19 ,that time the number of countries

inplant

Correct your spelling

implant

in plant

restrictions and keep a lot of

people

's life while other authorities do not pay attention so much and

inplant

Correct your spelling

implant

very little limitation .

As a result

this countries

Change the determiner

this country

these countries

show examples

people

decease.

On the other hand

, everyone's

health

are

Change the verb form

show examples

necessery

Correct your spelling

necessary

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

firstly

for themselves . If they want to be a healthy person , they should care

themself

Change preposition

for themself

show examples

For

instance

Add a comma

,instance

show examples

eating healthy food , every half year

Change the verb form

goes

show examples

to the doctor consult and do sport.

However

they do not want it , not only doctors but

also

fascinator

Change the verb form

does

show examples

not help

they

Change the pronoun

them

show examples

. In conclusion , not only authority but

also

people

responsible

their

Change preposition

for their

show examples

own

health

However

the latter more .

Submitted by sarvarovich98 on Tue May 18 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

206 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Your friend had made a plan for you to see a movie together but you cannot now not join him. You've found another friend who can go instead of you. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: ● Explain why you cannot go anymore ● Say who can go instead of you ● Say why this person is a good person to go with
How are you? I hope you are healthy and happy.I was very excited to see your letter after a long time and thrilled that you planned to watch a film with me but unfortunately, I will not be able to accompany you,because my grandmother is hospitalized due to illness and I need to be with her to take care.
4.5
band
Advertisement have impacted our modern world. Discuss the advantages and disadvanteges of advertisement.
It is irrifutable that advertisement is becoming ingcreasingly effect in our modern world nowadays. Advertising is a marketing strategy that aims to promote a specific product, or service. There are several advanteges and disadvanteges of advertisement and this essey aims to cover the benefits and drowbacks of advertising.
5.5
band
Nowadays, a lot of people use credit cards for online shopping. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
To begin, at present most of the time people prefer credit cards overpaying by cash. Even though there are certain drawbacks, I believe the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. A few decades back many were limited to local platforms to purchase goods and services but with the development of new technology now the world has become much more connected allowing us to choose from different vendors worldwide.
4
band
Young people should spend more time on cultural activities such as music and theater and less time on sport. How far do you agree with this statement?
In today's world, our young generation spends a lot of time on spiritual activities such as music and theatre and do not pay attention for sport. I strongly disagree with this opinion because it can damage their health and career progression. One of the main reason is that people do not spend time on sport because they are inspired by other things, such as music or theatre and they do not want to achieve their goals . Therefore, if they put a lot of effort for it, they will be tired. As a result, it can leads to serious problems with heath, such as obesity or diabet , as they have a sedentary lifestyle. For instance, nowadays the majority of teenagers who spend less time are suffering with health problems . Resent research found that approximately over half of young people have the obesity, while young people who spend more time for sport very well-being. Another reason is that a lack of sport experience in the life can negatively impacted on future career progression. Because...
8
band
As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.
Nowadays, after the emergence of the Internet , many people believe that physical newspapers won't exist in the future. I totally agree with this opinion because online modern news sites are cheaper, easier to access, reachable anywhere and anytime, eco-friendly, and more diverse.

Some people think that puplic health is a the responsibility of the government while others think people should be responsible for their own health. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Word Count

Advertisement have impacted our modern world. Discuss the advantages and disadvanteges of advertisement.

Nowadays, a lot of people use credit cards for online shopping. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Young people should spend more time on cultural activities such as music and theater and less time on sport. How far do you agree with this statement?

As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.