IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Many people work from home using modern technology today. Some people think that only the workers benefit from this and not the employer. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#people #work #home #technology #workers #benefit #employer
Due to advancements in
technology
Add a comma
,technology
show examples
 the percentage of
employees
 working from home has been increased drastically.
Certain
Add an article
A certain
show examples
 section of people
believe
Change the verb form
believes
show examples
 that only the
employees
 are
benefitied
Correct your spelling
benefited
benefitted
benefiting
 from
this
not
Add the comma(s)
,not
show examples
 the company.
This
 essay totally disagrees with the
above mentioned
Add a hyphen
above-mentioned
show examples
 statement that only
employees
 are benefited. On one hand, Work from home has so many benefits
such
 as the operating cost of the office is
decerased
Correct your spelling
decreased
decorated
 which saves
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
 of money
Change preposition
in inturn
show examples
Correct your spelling
in turn
show examples
inturn
Correct your spelling
in turn
show examples
 can be utilised for recruiting
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new
employess
Correct your spelling
employees
 as per the requirement of the business.
In addition
, the time for lunch and travel is reduced and can ask
employees
 to work for long hours which will increase the productivity.
On the other hand
, technology demands long working hours as a physical connection between the team is low. To cope up with the pressure the
employees
 are sitting for
long
Change the article
a long
show examples
 time
infront
Correct your spelling
in front
 of
system
Add an article
the system
a system
show examples
 which is not good for health both physically and mentally. Even they are unable to spend quality time with their family. Health problems like
spondilities
Correct your spelling
spondylitis
 and cervical pain problems are more
comman
Correct your spelling
common
 these days among the middle age people. In conclusion, it is certainly true that both the
employees
 and company are gaining profits with the new inventions of the technology by changing new working methods.
Submitted by gouni.prashanthreddy on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!