In many countries today there are many highly qualified graduates without employment. What factors may have caused this situation and what, in your opinion, can/should be done about it? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#countries #graduates #employment #factors #situation

I think that one of the most relevant factors is that the number of

people

over 60 that

are

Change the verb form

show examples

already working is very high.

This

is not just a decision from their mind, but

also

some governments,

for example

in Italy, are raising the retirement date because they have to pay all the debts. To equalize the economic system they raise the age of retirement for the old

people

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but do

this

cause the increase of the unemployees because the industries have a maximum number of employees. Another reason is that more and more

people

have graduated in theoretical subjects and they haven’t got some practical skills that are required in some jobs.

This

problem is becoming more frequent because

people

are

more lazy

Replace the words

lazier

show examples

than some decades ago. Some scientists are studying why

this

is happening, but we haven’t got results yet. I know some

people

that are searching for a job after graduation, but they found places that are not linked with the subject that they have studied like waiters or something like that. I

also

know

people

that have found jobs in their study area, but in percentage,

Change the capitalization

show examples

think that

this

kind of

people

is just 30% in front of the 70% of the ones that found a job

that is

not linked with their study travel. In

conclusion

Add a comma

,conclusion

show examples

I want to say that it is important to have practical skills to live a good life and try to adapt yourself to the world of work

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because theoretical arguments are

also

important, but more and more companies want

people

with a complete formation, practical and theoretical.

Submitted by silyakar on Fri Jun 11 2021

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

269 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The nuclear family is well adapted to moving due to its size. Do you think children benefit in any way from moving? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvanta

Art classes, such as paiting and drawing, are as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Multinational companies are becoming increasingly common in developing countries. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Some believe that younger family members should be legally responsible for supporting older family members when they become physically, mentally and financially unable to look after themselves.