Celebrities make a very good living out of media attention and have chosen to live in the public spot light. They have no right to complain when they feel the media are intruding on their privacy. To what extent do you agree and disagree with this opinion.

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The person who is famous in any sector leads a superb life without any public calling concern and they have a desire to face in front of the people.

However

Linking Words

, press conference sometimes interferes with their personal issues and famous

man

Fix the agreement mistake

men

show examples

cannot make allegations against them. From my perspective,

this

Linking Words

proposition is not completely true. It seems undeniable that everybody wants to be a star and

as a consequence

Linking Words

, they work hard

for achieving

Change preposition

to achieve

show examples

name

Correct article usage

a name

show examples

and fame.

Person

Correct article usage

A person

show examples

wishes that he could be a superstar in his soul and every human wants to be a fan of him.

Thus

Linking Words

, being ambitious in his life he can be a popular somebody in various events. As they are the man they have a personal heart and if it is exposed publicly their

works

Fix the agreement mistake

work

show examples

might be hampered.

On the contrary

Linking Words

, some individuals consider mark their personal errors in growth can lead

Change preposition

to a

show examples

perfect activity.

For instance

Linking Words

, a film star can achieve his name through hard work.

Conversely

Linking Words

, it should be controlled in their personal heart

Linking Words

therefore

Add the comma(s)

, therefore

show examples

, personal issues them should be spotted.

Moreover

Linking Words

, popular

man

Fix the agreement mistake

men

show examples

woman

Fix the agreement mistake

women

show examples

must have talent though they work hard. Being a familiar person in a province one must be an all-rounder in his tasks. Being a response to everyone he could be a famous one to everyone. In other ,words if they are not liable to answer publicly of their own tasks it could destroy their morale to people.

For example

Linking Words

football

Correct article usage

a football

show examples

or cricket star can give pleasure to the audience.

However

Linking Words

, if they are not good at their personal activity, they would

be fallen

Wrong verb form

fall

show examples

into gambling. In conclusion, all people want to be

Change the article

apply

show examples

famous and it is a good ambition.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, personal life should be restricted so that they would not be corrupted

Change preposition

show examples

any evil things.

SadiqMon Jun 21 2021

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task achievement

Your introduction could be clearer in stating your position. Try to directly express your agreement or disagreement with the statement.

coherence and cohesion

Enhance the logical flow between ideas. Ensure each paragraph relates directly to your main argument and transitions smoothly to the next.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to illustrate your points. For instance, refer to specific celebrities or incidents that exemplify your argument.

coherence and cohesion

Clarify your terminology and express your ideas more precisely. For example, 'popular man or woman' could be rephrased for clarity.

task achievement

Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and presents arguments from both sides of the discussion.

tasks achievement

You attempt to explore the implications of fame, which shows depth in your analysis.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

301 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

media attention
public spotlight
celebrity culture
symbiotic relationship
scrutiny
trade-offs
mental health
personal lives
media sensationalism
privacy violations
ethical boundaries
public interest
invasive tactics
stalking
privacy rights

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Influence of human beings on the world 's ecosystem is leaving to the extinction of species and loss of biodiversity. What are primary causes of loss of biodiversity ? What solutions can you suggest ?

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some people work for the same organisation all their working life, others think that it is better to work for different organisations. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

Some people think that they have right to use as much freshwater as they want. Others believe governments should tightly control the use of freshwater as it is limited resouece. Discuss both views and give your opinion.