These days, more and more people move away from the area where they were born and brought up when they become adults. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #move #area #adults #development

The given bar chart compares the amount of

participation

by youth in various eight sports activities in the year 1997 and 2017. It is apparent that overall

participation

in gentle walking was more than other categories of sports. Meanwhile, cricket and basketball showed a complete reverse trend to each other in the given years. Gentle walking was the most preferred by adults in 1997, with 50,000 numbers, which remained the highest again after 20 years of period. In regards to football and hiking, both were equally famous, in 1997 and 2017, the number of people involved in these games was approximately 35,000, which reached almost 50,000 in 2017. In 1997 and 2017, jogging and Gym showed the same pattern in the graph for both years, with similar figures about 35,000 adults'

participation

. Meanwhile, adult participated with only 10,000 numbers in basketball, which skyrocketed dramatically in 2017, with just more than doubled.

However

, the pattern for cricket is reversed totally with that of basketball, where 25,000

participation

was in 1997, which plummeted to just under 10,000 people in 2017.

Submitted by . on Fri Jun 25 2021

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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1Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

178 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

metropolitan
migration
globalization
socio-economic factors
traditional norms
cosmopolitan environment
brain drain
assimilation
gentrification
alienation
multiculturalism
infrastructure strain

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These days, more and more people move away from the area where they were born and brought up when they become adults. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

These days consumers are faced with an increasing amount of advertising from various companies. To what extent do you think consumers are influenced by advertising? What measures should be taken to protect them?

You and some friends ate a meal at a restaurant to celebrate a special occasion, and you were very pleased with the food and service.

Many people think that too much attention and resources are given to the protection of wild animals and birds. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that it is a good idea of all employees to wear a uniform at work.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Scientific research should be carried out and controlled by the governments rather than private companies. Do you agree or disagree?