These days, more and more people move away from the area where they were born and brought up when they become adults. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #move #area #adults #development

The given bar chart compares the amount of

participation

by youth in various eight sports activities in the year 1997 and 2017. It is apparent that overall

participation

in gentle walking was more than other categories of sports. Meanwhile, cricket and basketball showed a complete reverse trend to each other in the given years. Gentle walking was the most preferred by adults in 1997, with 50,000 numbers, which remained the highest again after 20 years of period. In regards to football and hiking, both were equally famous, in 1997 and 2017, the number of people involved in these games was approximately 35,000, which reached almost 50,000 in 2017. In 1997 and 2017, jogging and Gym showed the same pattern in the graph for both years, with similar figures about 35,000 adults'

participation

. Meanwhile, adult participated with only 10,000 numbers in basketball, which skyrocketed dramatically in 2017, with just more than doubled.

However

, the pattern for cricket is reversed totally with that of basketball, where 25,000

participation

was in 1997, which plummeted to just under 10,000 people in 2017.

Submitted by . on Fri Jun 25 2021

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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1Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

178 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

metropolitan
migration
globalization
socio-economic factors
traditional norms
cosmopolitan environment
brain drain
assimilation
gentrification
alienation
multiculturalism
infrastructure strain

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These days, more and more people move away from the area where they were born and brought up when they become adults. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Today many children and teenagers are overweight and unhealthy. Give reasons to explain why many young people are obese and give some solutions to fix the problem.

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can case serious social problems, as well as practical problems. to what extent do you agree or disagree with thia statement?

The government should control the amount of violence in films and on the television in order to decrease the level of violent crime in the society. To what extent you agree or disagree?

It is a common aspiration among people to run their own business, rather that work for an employer. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages?