Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think it is better to work for different organisations

Some people woThe issue has been widely discussed for decades. Some may say that staying at the
company
is a wise choice,
however
, those who believe switching to different organisations is even better. In the following paragraphs, I will apply both ideas before I offering my own viewpoint.
First
, there are many causes of the consequence of keeping to work for the same organisation. The most important one among them is promotion and salary. Generally speaking, You would get more opportunities for stepping up, the longer you stay in a
company
so that your
daliy
Correct your spelling
daily

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quality will be protected. No mention that you may earn more pension when you are tired in the future.
For instance
, lots of people always spend their whole life staying in
Japan
Replace the word
Japanese

The word Japan doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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company
for the same working culture which is illustrated above. Furthertheless, some people suppose that staying in the same place for a long time is risky especially for the young.
Freshman
Fix the agreement mistake
Freshmen

It seems that Freshman may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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should take the chance to learn more by changing the
working
Replace the word
workplace

The word working doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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place like a sponge. It helps to prepare themselves to confront the difficulties and to experience
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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colourful life. Leaving for a better
company
will give you a simulation to push you improved. It broadens your view if you get a chance to
compete
Add the preposition
forcompete

The phrase following the intransitive verb compete seems to be missing a preposition. Consider adding one.

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the chance working in different countries. To sum up, staying in the same job would bring you stable growth, whereas I prefer to make plans to change occupies to contact various interesting staff. I firmly believe that learning is the key way to contain a wonderful life.
Submitted by ikulau on

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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