consuming large amount of sugar is bad for the health. it is believed by some pupil that it is duty of government to reduce the productivity as well as consumption of sugary products but, others think that it is the responsibility of people to reduce the intake of junk food. In my forthcoming paragraphs, I am going to discuss both view and my feelings.

consuming
large
Change the article
a large
show examples
amount of sugar is bad for the health. it is believed by some
pupil
Fix the agreement mistake
pupils
show examples
that it is
duty
Add an article
the duty
show examples
of
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
to reduce the productivity as well as consumption of sugary products but, others think that it is the responsibility of people to reduce the intake of junk food. In my forthcoming paragraphs, I am going to discuss both
Correct pronoun usage
my view
show examples
view
Fix the agreement mistake
views
show examples
and my feelings. On the one hand,
Government
play
Change the verb form
plays
show examples
a vital role to restrict
amount
Add an article
the amount
show examples
of production of junk food.
Firstly
, there will be some rules and regulations related to the ingredients that are used for the manufacturing of
burger
Fix the agreement mistake
burgers
show examples
, pizza and sugary
drinks
.
For example
, a recent study is conducted on sugary
drinks
and it is found that if
sugar
Add an article
the sugar
show examples
level is below 40 calories
then
it is not going to harm humans.
Second
,
Government
should
banned
Change the verb form
ban
show examples
advertisements
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
some
drinks
which cause obesity and heart diseases. Because when young ones see any product on the advertisement and they pester their
parents
to buy the same product.
Thirdly
, there should be
education
Replace the word
educated
show examples
in schools about what to eat and how to stay healthy. on the flip side of
argument
Add an article
the argument
an argument
show examples
, individual's have to do something for themselves.
First
of all,
parents
encourage their kids to eat
home-made
Correct your spelling
homemade
show examples
food. in
this
way, they will stay away from obesity and know what they ate and which ingredients they used for cooking.
Secondly
, young ones should know the bad impacts of consuming large
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
soda
Change preposition
of soda
show examples
drinks
. To conclude,
Government
impose
Change the verb form
imposes
show examples
rules for manufacturing, restrict some advertisements and provide education in schools in order to maintain
good
Correct article usage
the good
show examples
health of their citizens. but
personally
Add a comma
,personally
show examples
I believe that
parents
should teach their
parents
to eat
healthy
Add an article
a healthy
show examples
diet.
Submitted by manpreetkaur.msc95 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: