Some people think students should study the science of food and how to prepare it. Others think that school time should be used in learning important subjects. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is believed that students ought to study the way food can be prepared and its science whereas others defend that their time in educational institutions
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
to be used wisely with useful matters. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
I will discuss both views and I will present my opinion towards the subject.
To begin
Linking Words
with, youngers go to
school
Use synonyms
to learn about several subjects which are important for caring a healthy and
independently
Replace the word
independent
show examples
life. Several teenagers are not well taught about nutrition neither at home nor in
school
Use synonyms
, because their parents may not care about
this
Linking Words
topic and
that is
Linking Words
why
school
Use synonyms
plays a fundamental role in their lives.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the lack of knowledge regarding
this
Linking Words
subject has brought about high levels of obesity which millennials are recently facing. For that reason, schools need to accurately cover
this
Linking Words
topic, because it is their responsibility to prepare young citizens to live properly and healthily.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, educational institutions need to focus on teaching technical subjects which are a fundamental knowledge to youngers lives.
In other words
Linking Words
, each grade has its own syllabus already defined by a national institution that regulates what needs to be taught
accordingly
Linking Words
with a person’s age and maturity. To illustrate, they are Math for 5th grade, Geography for 1st year and English for secondary
school
Use synonyms
.
Consequently
Linking Words
, some parents are against innovative
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
,
such
Linking Words
as nutrition, because they might affect the general learnt and may distract their infant from what really matters. They argue that it is a waste of time
having
Change the verb form
to have
show examples
cookery classes
instead
Linking Words
of learning about national history. In conclusion, both sides have their own merits,
however
Linking Words
, I defend that
school
Use synonyms
is a place where everything needs to be taught and well-explained to infants,
such
Linking Words
as cookery abilities and Maths. It is important to help teenagers handle well nutrition and food preparation
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because it is not a matter of cooking exclusively, but
also
Linking Words
keeping
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
good health and how to live properly,
Linking Words
otherwise
Add a comma
,otherwise
show examples
they could develop irreversible chronic diseases.
Submitted by alexandretco on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: