Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes, many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?
As we know, many health issues
cause
Wrong verb form
are caused
excessive
usage of sugary Change preposition
by excessive
productions
, and It relates to the high Replace the word
products
sugar
content of products
we use daily
life. I believe that increasing the price of Change preposition
in daily
products
cannot reduce sugar
consumption
. Firstly
, supporters of this
statement claim that the high price of sticky profits can prevent them from unhealthy usage. It means that they would avoid expensive additional products
to reduce household consumption
. This
view leads to two choices, including either to buy
big-budget unhealthy foods or cheaper healthy foodstuffs. Change the verb form
buying
For instance
, a study has shown that parents reduce buy
candies Wrong verb form
buying
to
their children because of high-cost Change preposition
for
products
containing sugar
in Great Britain. However
, it can be seen that this
scheme is being implemented. It pushes people to extra sugar
on
their food which is the reason Change preposition
to
of
many diseases. Change preposition
for
On the other hand
, realizing the harm of this
kind of usage rather
effective than enlargingAdd a missing verb
is rather
productions
with Fix the agreement mistake
production
sugar
. There are several examples that even though many companies make high-priced products
, there is no reduction in sugary consumption
. Especially, in children purchasing of
high-Change preposition
apply
sugar
content soft drinks and sweet candies is doubled in Australia. According to
real situations, it can make a worse than ever. In conclusion, however
, a high tax on products
that consist of sugar
components may be considered one of the good plans to force excessive candy consumption
. I firmly believe that giving more information about using
candied profits affects our health system is probably the best way to decrease unhealthy food choices.Rephrase
how using
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite