Some people argue that is more important to have an enjoyable job than to earn a lot of money. Others disagree and think that a good salary leads to a better life. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #job #money #salary #life

It is often argued that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

Job

which we desire makes us happy when compared with good pay. While

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apply

show examples

Others think that life becomes better when we earn handsome of money. In my opinion,

high

Correct article usage

a high

show examples

salary may

makes

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make

show examples

life easier but

desirable

Correct article usage

a desirable

show examples

job

is way better. To

embrak

Correct your spelling

embark

on, Currently, Every individual requires a

job

for

living

Add an article

a living

show examples

Now a days

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Nowadays

show examples

women are

also

intrested

Correct your spelling

interested

to do

jobs

and stand on their own.

However

, many

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apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people are picking up

jobs

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

are not based on their particular stream because of good pay. At

first

Add a comma

,first

show examples

it may

makes

Change the verb form

make

show examples

them happy but later

Add a comma

,on

show examples

they will lose

intrest

Correct your spelling

interest

and couldn't be productive.

For example

, At present many students are choosing engineering which is a great stream but there are no sufficient

jobs

due to overpopulation. So, many of them are moving towards different

jobs

call

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a call

show examples

center

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centre

show examples

, paramedical and taking over their family business in which they

has

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have

show examples

less interest. They may make better pay but they are not happy and satisfied in the particular field. Whereas, Some individuals work in their specific streams even they get less pay because it makes them

jublient

Correct your spelling

jubilant

. They just wait for their turn

untill

Correct your spelling

until

they get

job

Add an article

a job

show examples

Correct your spelling

interested

intrested

Correct article usage

an intrested

show examples

field rather than working in other fields.

For instance

, One of my

cousin

Change to a plural noun

cousins

show examples

has studied computer science and has more

intrest

Correct your spelling

interest

in hacking but he got a

job

as a coder which has

Remove the article

apply

show examples

good pay. At

first

Add a comma

,first

show examples

he got bewildered.

However

, he rejected it and waited for his ideal

job

eventhough

Correct your spelling

even though

there is

lot

Change the article

a lot

show examples

of pressure from

family

Correct pronoun usage

his family

show examples

. Now, he is very productive and has

Change the article

the

show examples

best pay when compared with their

collegues

Correct your spelling

colleagues

. To sum up, Different kinds of

jobs

may be available in the market with outstanding pay but In my opinion, opting

desired

Change preposition

for desired

show examples

jobs

makes us happy and satisfied rather than

job

Correct article usage

a job

show examples

with good pay.

Submitted by vallipodipireddy5 on Wed Jul 07 2021

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
35Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

312 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people argue that is more important to have an enjoyable job than to earn a lot of money. Others disagree and think that a good salary leads to a better life. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some countries have come up with law to restrict the working hours of an employee. What is the reason for this? Is that positive or negative ?

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us buy things. Other people think that is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays more and more older people who need employment have to compete with younger people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause? What are the solutions?

Many people believe that music is just a form of entertainment, whilst others believe that music has a much larger impact on society today. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. (250 words).

Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real need of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?