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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that university education should focus on the skills of employment for the future. Others think they should focus on academic study only. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #university #education #focus #skills #employment #future #study
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Nowadays, the growing number of
people
Use synonyms
 have provoked
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
vigorous arguments on education meaning. Whether should we concentrate on the practical
skills
Use synonyms
 so that we can be guaranteed to have a high quality of life or should we just need to master the
theory
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 of
subject
Add an article
the subject
show examples
 and professional knowledge. To an extent, I think
this
Linking Words
 topic is not a black and white problem and it is not noticeable wrong only if we choose either of them. A considerable amount of
people
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 argues that enrolling in university is closer to
the
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apply
show examples
success and which means
to
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apply
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getting
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get
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 a decent
job
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 in the future by grasping the specific
skills
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 in the near future. Comparing with
the
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apply
show examples
theory
Use synonyms
 or academic studying,
people
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 prefer to put their energy
on
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into
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 practical
skills
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. Especially for some kind of
job
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, like doctors
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 need yearly experience and tons of experimental practices in
clinical
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a clinical
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test
Fix the agreement mistake
tests
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. Only familiar with
theory
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or
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of
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 knowledge but lack of practical
skills
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 would lead to tragedy to some families when they operate on patients. Over and above that the public who equal the excellent
job
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skills
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 as the same with the successful life through a high paying
job
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. And
that is
Linking Words
 why some of them convey the aiming
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the validity
studying
Change preposition
of studying
show examples
 in the university rather than academic learning. Others
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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think the public should focus on academic study only because of the following reasons. On the one hand, due to the social structure which
are
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is
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 quite different
with
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from
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 that of from the past.
People
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 can only get finite food by contributing their
labor
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labour
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 on the farm and afraid of disasters by the nature influence in the agricultural society in the past.
However
Linking Words
, nowadays,
people
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 can
ignorant
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ignore
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 the environmental control factors and grow crops in the vertical farms or indoor by the contemporary techniques by the scientists who are studying advanced
skills
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 by the advanced academic essays or basic on some results from the other scholars who get Nobel prize in
this
Linking Words
 field. The
theory
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 and advanced academic knowledge
is
Change the verb form
are
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 essential to the public in the fast-paced society. Some practical jobs would not be needed and demolished in recent years.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, advanced academic result in science, physics or some outbreaks on space exploration
is become
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becomes
has become
show examples
 a new weapon between with the countries which are striving for
competing
Add the preposition
forcompeting
show examples
 the dominance right
in finite
Correct your spelling
infinite
show examples
 resources in the future. In conclusion, specific
skills
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 quite important for the public who want to get a nice
job
Use synonyms
, whereas,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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advanced academic studying
also
Linking Words
 is essential to the scholars and countries to
continuing
Change the form of the verb
continue
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 to compete for the
dominance
Replace the word
dominant
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 situation in the world.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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