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Band 4.5

some poeple believe that it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#poeple #situation #job #shortage #money #situations
Difficult circumstances can occur every day. Certain
people
 think that accepting a difficult condition in our
life
 is better than trying to enhance that condition,
for
example
Add the comma(s)
,example
show examples
 joyless job or lack of money.
This
 essay will discuss both sides of the argument in detail and provide evidence as to why attempting to improve the
situation
 is better. Some
people
 consider that when they have a bad day, or a difficult
situation
 they should allow
this
 in their
life
 and live with
this
. Sometimes
this
 may be the case because you can think about your fault or what you did wrong.
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
this
 is not the best
options
Fix the agreement mistake
option
show examples
 nowadays because in
this
 world there are many
people
 who can replace you in your work or daily
life
.
Great
Change the article
A great
show examples
 deal of adults and even teenagers assume that currently when we have
such
 a
situation
 we should try to enhance our skills and find the best way of resolving certain
difficult
Replace the word
difficulties
show examples
.
This
 actively demonstrates that at present there are many
competitor
Change to a plural noun
competitors
show examples
 and many skilled persons that can take your job or can be more useful than you.
As a
result
Add a comma
,result
show examples
 you can lose your job , have
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
money or have
Correct article usage
a problem
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 with your health
as a result
. In
this
case
Add a comma
,case
show examples
 the best way of avoiding
such
 problems in our
life
 are:
firstly
 to enhance new skills and
secondly
 asking for help. To draw the conclusion , in these days and ages where live many skilled
people
 we cannot deal with a bad
situation
 , only to try to get better and go on, no matter how difficult it is.
Submitted by leftercatalina841 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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