IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that the government should strictly control the supply of fresh water, as the resources are limited. While others think we can use as much as we want. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Water
Use synonyms
 is an utmost important natural resource gifted by nature to humankind.
While
Linking Words
 a few
people
Use synonyms
 think that the
fresh
Use the right word
freshwater
show examples
water
Use synonyms
 consumption to be controlled with stringent rules by the government, others think that it should be available for
people
Use synonyms
 as much as they
wanted
Wrong verb form
want
show examples
 to use. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss both views in detail and provide my supporting examples to prove
the
Correct word choice
that the
show examples
 former statement takes precedence. There are two reasons for the supporters to believe that the fresh
water
Use synonyms
 availability should be abundant for the common
people
Use synonyms
. First of all, fresh
water
Use synonyms
 is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 basic necessity for humans for daily activities and to be provided
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
free of cost. Different purposes,
for instance
Linking Words
, like drinking, washing clothes, bathing,
Correct your spelling
etc.
etcetera
Punctuation problem
etcetera,
show examples
 are the minimum amenities for every individual, without which they cannot survive. Adding to
this
Linking Words
, they feel that governments should make sure the
rain
Use the right word
rainwater
show examples
water
Use synonyms
 harvesting pits
to be
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
 constructed at
required
Correct article usage
the required
show examples
 places to increase the
ground
Use the right word
groundwater
show examples
water
Use synonyms
 availability during the rainy season. The average rainfall recorded in India,
for instance
Linking Words
, during the
last
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 academic year was 76% which is way higher than the previous years, but could not be stored by governments
due to
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 the lack of storage bodies.
On the contrary
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, the others, including me, think that strong
polocies
Correct your spelling
policies
 should govern
people
Use synonyms
 in
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
 direction to use
water
Use synonyms
 in a limited way to save it for future generations.
Due to
Linking Words
 the lack of proper governance
pure
Punctuation problem
, pure
show examples
water
Use synonyms
 facilities are enjoyed by only the richer communities, leaving the poor
people
Use synonyms
 in
thrust
Use the right word
the dust
show examples
. Many independent gated communities,
for example
Linking Words
, are never bothered about it, as they are consuming 77% of
Use synonyms
water
Correct article usage
the water
show examples
 in Hyderabad city
as
Punctuation problem
, as
show examples
 per the statistics of the renowned News channel.
Apart from
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this
Linking Words
, the misconsumption of
this
Linking Words
 natural resource is another reason for
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon. Many resorts and hotels,
for instance
Linking Words
, are using Millions of Gallons in games and swimming pools for
recreations
Replace the word
recreational
show examples
 and entertainment
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
. In conclusion, many
people
Use synonyms
 think that the
fresh
Use the right word
freshwater
show examples
water
Use synonyms
 delivery to be controlled by the government policies,
while
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others think that they should not charge any amount to use it. I completely opine that local governance should closely monitor
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it's
Use the right word
its
show examples
 usage as it is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 basic necessity for everyone and to be shared
between
Rephrase
equally between
show examples
poor
Correct article usage
the poor
show examples
 and
rich
Correct article usage
the rich
show examples
 with equality.

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structure
Make a clear plan for your essay. Each idea should have a main sentence and a detail.
language
Check your grammar and word form. Some words are misused or misspelled.
content
Use real and steady facts. Do not rely on off facts.
content
You present both sides of the argument.
task
You give your own view clearly.
structure
You use examples to support ideas.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • government intervention
  • resource management
  • water scarcity
  • water conservation
  • equitable distribution
  • water wastage
  • efficient usage
  • individual freedom
  • economic growth
  • industrial needs
  • agricultural demands
  • personal viewpoint
What to do next:
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