the amount of leisure time enjoyed by men and women of different employment status.

The diagram gives more information about the number of free time to get pleasure
both
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for both
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females and
males
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of
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in
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various employment situations.
This
Linking Words
statistic
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illustrates 5 categories 1998-1999. We can see,generally, a high rate belonged unemployed
males
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with 85
hours
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in a
week
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, on the one hand,retired
males
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are more close.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the minimum pointer was appreciated with almost 38
hours
Use synonyms
in a
week
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and
this
Linking Words
statistic
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occurred in employed in full time.
In addition
Linking Words
, unemployed women and retired women level off with approximately 78
hours
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in a
week
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.On top of
that
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,that
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there aren't employed
males
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in part-
timetime
Correct your spelling
time time
and housewives. They're between at least
statistic
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is equal 40
hours
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. Index of housewives equalled 50
hours
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.
Finally
Linking Words
, employed in
full-
Add an article
the full-timetime
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timetime
Correct your spelling
time time
index was introduced with approximately 43
hours
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in a
week
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. Taking everything into consideration, the best
statistic
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belonged
unemployed
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to unemployed
show examples
males
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than the others.As well, the worst number happened in employed females in full time

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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