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Band 5.5

Some say that it would be better if the majority of employees worked from home instead of traveling to a work place every day. Do you think the advantages of working from home outweigh the disadvantages?

#say #majority #employees #home #work #place
Although
 there is no doubt that working remotely is an enormous weal, it is important to consider how employers will track the productivity of their
employees
. While there are abundant people who think that going to
office
Add an article
the office
show examples
 is crucial, some believe that it is a waste of
time
. In
this
 disquisition, I will delve into both arguments, and I will explain my supporter for
latter
Add an article
the latter
show examples
 view.
To begin
 with drawbacks, one of the biggest disadvantages of working from
home
 that face employers is being
uncapable
Correct your spelling
incapable
 of tracking
performance
Add an article
the performance
show examples
 of your workers.
This
 happens because many managers will not be able to keep an eye on the progress of the daily tasks they provide to their
employees
.
In other words
, managers will not be able to share their ideas and their comments immediately and they will struggle to explain their ideas to complete the task.
Consequently
,
this
 tends to not achieve tasks on
time
, which will inevitably
leads
Change the verb form
lead
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 to less productivity.
Nevertheless
,
employees
 who work from
home
 get an opulent benefit by doing their duties far from the site.
this
 is an advantage because they can save a lot of
time
, which is wasted on transportation.
For instance
,
accoridung
Correct your spelling
according
 to a study conducted by The Guardian, 55% of
employees
 whose work can be done from
home
 feel satisfied and more productive. To clarify, these people feel that that they save
time
, which is a vital factor, to study and gain new skills.
Subsequently
, the newly gained skills will be broadening their horizons, which will impact substantially their performance at work. To epitomize, despite
of
Remove the preposition
apply
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tracking
performance
Add an article
the performance
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 of
employees
on site
Add a hyphen
on-site
show examples
 is mandatory, I consider that the advantages of working from
home
 outweigh the disadvantages. Personally, I am a vehement backer of providing jobs, which can be monitored remotely.
Submitted by ahmed.adel.saad6 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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