Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising, and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To which extent do you agree or disagree?

The current increase in sales of the most purchased
items
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
mirror the strength of marketing and not the actual market demand. From my perspective, I totally agree that marketing positively influences
purchase
Fix the agreement mistake
purchases
show examples
surpassing the real market need.
Firstly
, marketing plays a critical role in demand
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and is a key influencer in impulse buying. To elaborate more, many buyers are drawn to
procurement
Add an article
the procurement
show examples
of commodities way beyond their means consuming the resources that would
otherwise
have added value elsewhere.
Additionally
, what is
more
Add a comma
,more
show examples
talked about, seen, or read by the consumer, determines their decision during purchase
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
The use of glamorous successful people in clips and billboards
therefore
Add the comma(s)
,therefore
show examples
, blinds the consumer to believe that they as well need to possess and live a life of success. Safaricom a telecommunication company for
instant
Add an article
an instant
show examples
, has managed to clinch the highest number of subscribers after dedicating a substantial amount of their budget to
advertisement
Add an article
the advertisement
an advertisement
show examples
.
Besides
Safaricom, KFC a premier global fast-food company has almost managed to conquer the hospitality industry by harnessing the power of advertisement, to have their presence in almost every country worldwide.
On the other hand
, basic
items
like food, clothing, and shelter are less often inclined to advertisement since the buyer needs them for survival and comfort. In conclusion, it is my opinion that increased sales in the
market place
Correct your spelling
marketplace
show examples
are realized
as a result
of marketing and is not a reflection of demand. It does not only lead to
purchase
Add an article
the purchase
show examples
of unwanted
items
but
also
influences over-spending on non-critical
items
.
Submitted by Sabina Hamisi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumer behavior
  • perceived need
  • lifestyle aspirations
  • brand image
  • prestige
  • psychological techniques
  • scarcity
  • social proof
  • celebrity endorsements
  • technological advancements
  • product innovations
  • emerging consumer needs
What to do next:
Look at other essays: