Participation by 5 to 14-year-olds in selected leisure activities in Australia

#participation #leisure #activities #australia

The bar graph compares the percentage of participation that

children

in Australia, between

boys

and

girls

, have in selected leisure activities,

such

as: skateboarding, bike riding, watching TV or videos, computer games, art and craft. Overall, it is clear

boys

spend more free time in certain activities than

girls

. Sports and entertainment are the

favorites

Change the spelling

favourites

show examples

of Australian male

children

, while Australian female

children

enjoy their leisure time making arts and

craft

Fix the agreement mistake

crafts

show examples

. Watching TV or videos is the greatest activity that 5 to 14-year-olds enjoy a great deal.

However

, in the rest of

pastimes

Correct article usage

the pastimes

show examples

boys

lead on the graph. Sports as skateboarding and bike riding make a difference around 10% than Australian

girls

Otherwise

, the comparison about computer games played by

boys

is 20% than

girls

On the other hand

, the only pastime female

children

enjoy more than male

children

in Australia, according to the chart, is art and craft. The difference between both

children

’ gender is over 10%, but less

Change preposition

than 20

show examples

Submitted by mayra.moresol on Fri Jul 23 2021

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

161 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Participation by 5 to 14-year-olds in selected leisure activities in Australia

Fully explain your ideas

Death penalty is still practiced in jurisdiction system of many countries. Some people believe that this type of punishment should be abolished. However, others are of opposite opinion. Discuss both sides of this debate and give your own opinion.

Some people say that government should control the amount of violation in films and on television to control crimes in society How far do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many countries government spend a lot of money on arts. However, some think government should spend more on health and education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people's lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibilities.

It is sometimes said that a high salary is the most important factor in choosing a job. Do you agree?