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Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantage of being self-employed?

#people #work #company #organization #be #case
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It is undeniable that many
people
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 in modern society are often choosing to be
business
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 owners, rather than to be
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Add an article
an employee
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employee
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employees
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 in a
company
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 in a
company
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 or
organization
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. From my point of view, the reasons of
people
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 are being self-employed have many causes
such
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 as income, independence and quantity of
work
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, and being self-employed not only offer the benefits
,
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apply
show examples
 but
also
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 offer the
drawbacks
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. In the following paragraph, both
question
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questions
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of
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on
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this
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 topic will be outlined in the detail. It is true to say that the world has changed from before, new technology has been used
from
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by
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 everyone, many
people
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 are becoming more knowledgeable, as the result, the great
people
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 choose to be
business
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 owners, rather than to be
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Add an article
an employee
show examples
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
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 in a
company
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. One of the important reasons
of
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for
show examples
 their
deciding
Replace the word
decision
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 is that self-employed is
independence
Replace the word
independent
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 from
system
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the system
a system
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 of a
company
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 or
organization
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.
For example
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, if they
work
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 in a
company
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, they will not spend
long
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a long
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time
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to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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travel, compared with working on
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
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business
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.
Additionally
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, many
people
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 said that working in
the
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a
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 big
organization
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 has
the
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apply
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pressure from their chief who want to
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have the
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
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 good quality of
work
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 without
the
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apply
show examples
good advice. Another reason is that the
employee
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frequently
Add a missing verb
are frequently
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 dissatisfied with their salary which is inappropriate whit
quantity
Correct article usage
the quantity
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 of their
work
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, and low welfares
such
Linking Words
 as health care
service
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services
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 are often provided by their
organization
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. One of the
drawbacks
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 of being self-employed is that they are responsible for everything within their own
business
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, but
people
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 who in a
company
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 must not manage
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
everything in their
work
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.
Secondly
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 of the
drawbacks
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 is that they have a lot of pressure
form
Correct your spelling
from
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problems
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such
Linking Words
 as
employee
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problems
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, finance
problems
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, customers
problems
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 and others, as the result, they have a lot of stress. Another
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
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drawbacks
Fix the agreement mistake
drawback
show examples
 of being self-employed
is
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are
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 unstable working
time
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 because every
business
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 owner
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 to
work
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 all the
time
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such
Linking Words
 as customers from
Add an article
the oversea
an oversea
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oversea
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overseas
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 call for
work
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 when they go to bed, they must talk even though it was late for bed, as the result, they are in poor health, and they cannot spend a lot of
time
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 with friend and family due to they have to devote all their
time
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 to their
business
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. In conclusion, being self-employed is
offer
Fix the agreement mistake
offers
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 both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
benefits and
the
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apply
show examples
drawbacks
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 to everyone.
Therefore
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, it is recommended that
people
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 who want to be
business
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 owners should have the proper readiness
such
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 as responsibility and knowledge for their own
business
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.
Submitted by kitsanayuiyui on

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Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • self-employed
  • company
  • organization
  • freedom
  • independence
  • income potential
  • flexibility
  • working hours
  • working location
  • passions
  • interests
  • decision-making
  • business practices
  • disadvantages
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