Studies show that crime rates are lower among those with educational degrees. Therefore, the best wat to reduce the rime rate is to educate criminals while they are still in prison. To extent do you agree or disagree?

#studies #show #crime #rates #degrees #wat #rime #rate #criminals #prison

Researchers show that criminals activities are low when pupils have academic degrees. The effective way to reduce

crime

is to educate criminals while they are still in the prison house. It seems to me that educate

people

always do better in personal and social lives.

To begin

with,

education

can change

prisoners

minds positively and help them to build up their careers when they could go outside.

Consequently

, if offenders have an opportunity to learn in jail, they may prepare themselves for future livelihood. due to educational qualification, after jail, they would not go for

crime

, searching job and

education

can help them to find any other jobs;

prisoners

no need to

crime

again.

Finally

, every person may lead to a better lifestyle, when

prisoners

do know how to earn money in a good way

then

they could not have

Change the article

the

show examples

interest to do any

crime

. Admittedly, in prison,

education

may favour

to connect

Change the verb form

connecting

show examples

with society and

to achieve

Change the verb form

achieving

show examples

social value.

Moreover

prisoners

make themselves

asa

Correct your spelling

good and honest

people

when they have instructional knowledge.

As a result

, they do not involve offence, and it happens positive outcomes in society. Hense,

crime

decreases and

people

stay to continue a happier and safe life; remove

pohiba

Correct your spelling

Cohiba

against criminals, make themse;lives sociable.

For example

, community

people

always want to go outside when they have no fear and it is common in most of the cities in today's world. To conclude, educational level diminish

crime

from the prison when they are in jail. I feel that offenders need social value and personal strength, and only

education

can do ideal results.

Those

Change preposition

For those

show examples

who have educational degrees, the crimes ratio is lower in the

researchers

Change to a genitive case

researcher's

researchers'

show examples

experiment. if the

crime

has gone from society, it makes

people

blessed.

Submitted by mksabbir3439 on Mon Aug 02 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

292 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Studies show that crime rates are lower among those with educational degrees. Therefore, the best wat to reduce the rime rate is to educate criminals while they are still in prison. To extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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