IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Nowadays, plastic money replacements such as credit and debit cards are extremely popular, even more than banknotes and coin. Advantages and Disadvantages

#plastic #money #replacements #credit #debit #cards #banknotes #coin
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In the contemporary era, the use of cards is more and more popular than the old traditional exchange
money
Use synonyms
. In the following paragraphs, the benefits and drawbacks of the circumstances will be discussed in detail before the conclusion is reached. One clear advantage of card cash is that most people can pay for expensive things or many more products with one card, so there is extreme convenience everywhere.
For example
Linking Words
, if people obtain more paper
money
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, it is easy to steal and it is difficult to put all the cash in their wallet. Another equally crucial benefit is that
VISA
Correct article usage
a VISA
show examples
 or Master Card can
pay
Wrong verb form
be used
show examples
 in many countries without exchanging
money
Use synonyms
 before going abroad.
Nevertheless
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, there are some disadvantages to digital
money
Use synonyms
 replacement.
First,
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having problems in local or undeveloped areas where they do not have cash machines makes the value of debit cards unavailable, making individuals unable to buy goods. Secord, the criminal, is a serious issue.
This
Linking Words
 is because people would face a huge loss not only on the check but
also
Linking Words
all
Change preposition
on all
show examples
 the currency in the bank
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
linked to personal information.
For instance
Linking Words
, if the bandit steals the coin in their bag, it will disappear. Not only that, if a person is stolen, electronic
money
Use synonyms
 could be linked with some private data, which means the bandit could receive more than a penny.
To sum up
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, It depends on a person's preference to decide whether it is convenient to use credit cards or not.
However
Linking Words
, the most important aspect to remember is that the robbery should be closely careful.
Submitted by forever_np on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay's introduction and conclusion are clear, indicating your understanding of essay structure, which is good practice. The main body paragraphs, however, need clearer topic sentences that precisely highlight the advantages and disadvantages.
Task Achievement
You addressed the task and provided a balanced view on the topic of plastic money. However, your ideas need to be expanded with more detailed examples to highlight the advantages and disadvantages effectively. Ensure that each point made is clearly supported with specific and relevant examples.
Lexical Resource
Your lexical resource is adequate with a range of vocabulary used throughout the essay. However, aim to use a wider variety of complex vocabulary and expressions related to the topic, and ensure proper word forms and collocations are used.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy
There is a decent range of grammatical structures in your essay. However, focus on sentence complexity and variety to enhance readability. Also, pay attention to grammatical accuracy, particularly with verb forms and sentence construction. Frequent errors can lower your score drastically.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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