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Band 5

Nowadays parents are sending their children on trips abroad for educational purposes. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

#parents #children #trips #purposes
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Nowdays
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Nowadays
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, education is one of the most essential figures in peoples' lives,
therefore
, many students were approved to pursue
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 education outside the boundary for a better opportunity and life
skill
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skills
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.
On the other hand
, some people believe there
also
Add a missing verb
are also
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 some drawbacks
from
Change preposition
to
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 studying abroad.In
this
 essay, I will explain the
benifits
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benefits
 and
drawsbacks
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drawbacks
studying
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of studying
show examples
 in
an international countries
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international countries
an international country
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.
To begin
 with, some parents believe that their kids will
thive
Correct your spelling
thrive
have
 in a wider range of
skill
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skills
show examples
becuase
Correct your spelling
because
 they are in
the
Correct article usage
a
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 multi-national environment, so they may have more connections and learn to cope with the diversity by themselves.
Therefore
, living in different
contries
Correct your spelling
countries
 allows them to
enchance
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enhance
 their living skill.
For instance
, I had a chance to attend a Cultural Exchanged program in the United States, I
experiencd
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experienced
 a culture shock during my stay,
thus
i
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I
show examples
 need to learn the differences and put more
attemp
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attempt
 to understand the diversity.
On the contrary
, pupils
capable
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are capable
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 to experience some disadvantages from staying in a different country as well
becuase
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because
 they are from diverse backgrounds and
somethimes
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sometimes
 they may
lacks
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lack
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of
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apply
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curtural
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cultural
culture
 knowledge so it could lead
a
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to a
show examples
culture shock issue.One of the most obvious examples is
racism
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the racism
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 issue in America; plenty of
asians
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Asians
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 were discriminated
and
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against and
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racisted
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racist
 by the
americans
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Americans
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 just because of
the
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their
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 external
appearence
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appearance
, which resulted in aggressive actions
occured
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occurred
.
Therefore
, students need to handle the risks by themselves and difficult to get
assited
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assisted
. In conclusion, children will reap the benefits of studying abroad by getting wider ranges of their skill-set
such
 as
ability
Add an article
the ability
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 to cope with the
diffrences
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differences
difference
.
Wheareas
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Whereas
, there
also
 a vivid negative live in
different
Add an article
a different
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 country as they may face some culture shock issue.
Submitted by minwassamon on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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