In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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In
this
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emerging
advance
Replace the word
advanced

The word advance doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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technology industry, some countries can elevate their
transportation
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

systems to the
next
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level.
People
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

said that it is beneficial to execute on constructing new
high speed
Add a hyphen
high-speed

It appears that high speed is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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railway that
connect
Change the verb form
connects

The plural verb connect does not appear to agree with the singular subject new high speed railway. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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between cities.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, some communities do not have the same opinion since the
money
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should be spent on the improvement of the existing public
transportation
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. In
this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay, I will discuss these views, and give
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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plausible conclusion on why I support
this
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construction. Many developed countries have a remarkable
transportation
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

system to accommodate their citizens in
a
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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fast and comfortable
ways
Correct the article-noun agreement
way

The indefinite article a may not be required with the plural noun ways in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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. In
this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

case, constructing a new railway to link the cities is a good plan for the country itself.
For instance
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, many
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses

It seems that business may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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business
Correct your spelling
businessman

The word business man seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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man
Change to a plural noun
men

The singular countable noun man follows the quantifier many, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.

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only
have
Change the verb form
has

The plural verb have does not appear to agree with the singular subject many business man. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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a limited time to be spent
in
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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a long journey. It can support
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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modern and busy
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to travel
in
Correct your spelling
inefficient

The word in efficient seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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efficient
Add an article
an efficient

The noun phrase efficient way seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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way. Another one, there will be a significant increase
of
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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job
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities

It seems that opportunity may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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for
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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workless
people
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. They can earn
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

from
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

construction as they now get a new occupation.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

argue in that opinion. They think that
those huge amount
Change the determiner
that huge amount
those huge amounts

It appears that the plural demonstrative those is modifying the singular noun amount. Consider using a singular demonstrative or a plural noun instead.

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of cash can be allocated to fix and improve the existing public transportations. Some old
transportation
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

modes are still functioning well. It might have some little
repairment
Replace the word
repair

The word repairment doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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, but it does not cost a lot of
money
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. When the fixing is done, those modes can accommodate their citizens’ activity again.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it is a short term solution since it might be broken again and
Linking Words
Linking Words
finally
Add a comma
,finally

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase finally. Consider adding a comma.

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the government should buy a new one. In conclusion, constructing
a new high speed railways
Correct the article-noun agreement
a new high speed railway
new high speed railways

The indefinite article a may not be required with the plural noun railways in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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is a good choice because it will provide us
the
Add the preposition
with the

It appears that you are missing a preposition with the verb provide. Consider adding the preposition.

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easiness and various types of
job
Add an article
the job
a job

The noun phrase job opportunity seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities

It seems that opportunity may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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. Whereas, using the old public
transportation
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

cannot fully fulfil what
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

era wants.
Hence
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I certainly agree with spending
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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building new railways to adjust our situation now.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • efficient
  • congestion
  • sustainable
  • environmentally friendly
  • connectivity
  • economic growth
  • public transportation
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