IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic. Improvements in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas . To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#argument #case #reader #specialist #topic #improvements #health #education #trade #development #nations #governments #responsibility #areas
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In a developing
country
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, it’s important to develop our knowledge about
health
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, education and stock and the rich
countries
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 around the developing
country
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 should help them to improve those factors. Overall, I disagree enough with the opinion that other
countries
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 which have a good economy should help surrounding
countries
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 that are not as rich as them. The developing
countries
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 are competing about improving their education to increase their people smarter to change the condition of their
country
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 to become better.
However
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, one factor isn't enough to encourage the
country
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 to improve, it must help
health
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 conditions that improve year by year with
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
shopestaced
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shop stacked
 facilities of hospital tools. To increase the economic growth of a
country
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, the
country
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 must do export-import to manage the
devisa
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device
 of the
country
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 that make the
country
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 richer. All of these factors can make the
country
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 itself better without help from other rich
countries
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 around. Despite, improvements all of the factors need big effort and money to
has
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have
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 a good of the education’s background that make the society smarter and grow the
country
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. Healthy growth needs a lot of money to change the
health
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 quality of the
country
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. And
last
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, trade can manage the economic balance of the
country
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. In Conclusion, developing
countries
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 should improve their condition of
health
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, education, and trade.
However
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, the improvement should be done by the
country
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Correct your spelling
itself
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it self
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itself
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. Without help from
other rich
Change the wording
another rich country
other rich countries
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country
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.
Submitted by auzanghiffari on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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