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Writing Samples
Band 5

the charts below show information about honey-bee colonies and honey production in the US

the charts below show information about honey-bee colonies and honey production in the US
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The charts give information about the number of
honey
Use synonyms
-bee
colonies
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 and the
amount
Use synonyms
 of
honey
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
 in the US between 1970 and 2010. In general, in 1980, the number of
honey
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-bee
colonies
Use synonyms
were
Change the verb form
was
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 the highest number
the
Correct article usage
apply
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during
this
Linking Words
priod
Correct your spelling
period
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the largest
amount
Use synonyms
 of
honey
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
were
Change the verb form
was
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 in 1976,
Overall
Linking Words
, in 2010, the
colonies
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 and
honey
Use synonyms
 had the lowest rates. From 1970 to 1980 the
colonies
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 rose and they reached just up 4
millions
Change to singular
million
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. After 1980, the numbers went down each year till 2010.
According
Add the preposition
toAccording
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 the chart, in 2010, there were just under 2
millions
Change to singular
million
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. The
amount
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 of
honey
Use synonyms
production
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 fell to 110000 tonnes from 1970 to 1980.
However
Linking Words
, the
colonies
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 decreased during the same
priod
Correct your spelling
period
. Afterwards,
this
Linking Words
amount
Use synonyms
 increased to 120000 tonnes in 1990. Between 1990 and 2010,
honey
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production
Use synonyms
 dropped each year in 2010 it was
the
Correct article usage
apply
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less
amount
Use synonyms
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words colonies, amount, honey, production with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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