In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extent do you think this is a positive trend?

#people #hobby #trend

In the past,

people

use to do shopping only for their functional necessities.

However

, nowadays modern

people

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

made shopping

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

show examples

leisure activity. In my opinion, the former proposition appears to be more rational.

This

essay will

further

elaborate my views for favouring the positive and negative impact of

this

trend and

thus

will lead to a logical conclusion. Analysing the statement and explaining

further

, the

first

and the foremost reason, these days

people

are busy with their working schedules. Due to

this

, they do not get enough time with their families.

Besides

, there are piles of chores regarding their household which they generally plan to do in their spare time.

Therefore

, the knock-on effect of shopping is that all family members have a chance to gather together along with minimizing

anxiety

Add an article

the anxiety

show examples

of buying household items as well.

Moreover

, children can play in the playgrounds owing to the amenities of the developed malls and their parents can buy stuff from there without being worried about their juveniles.

However

, on the other side, It has drawbacks as well. To commence with, mankind especially teenagers acquire items which are in the trend or popular. To explicate, every year new mobile phones have launched, and the crowd become crazy to get

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

. Despite

Remove the preposition

apply

show examples

high prized,

people

purchase it without thinking for a

second

, even though, the features of new phones

dose

Correct your spelling

does

show examples

not change as much.

Therefore

, modern humankind does not believe in saving their earnings

nevertheless

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

ancient time

people

invest their money only on useful items. To conclude, One can reach a conclusion that shopping as a pastime

considered

Add a missing verb

is considered

show examples

a negative impact

although

this

could be acceptable only when

people

would do it once

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a month.

Submitted by ak8531526 on Tue Sep 07 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

288 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

consumerism
retail therapy
materialism
disposable income
economic growth
financial instability
environmental impact
social interaction
community building
emotional satisfaction
advertising influence
shopping habits

What to do next:

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In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extent do you think this is a positive trend?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

With the increasing demand for energy sources of oil and gas, people should look for sources of oil and gas in remote and untouched natural places. Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages of damaging such areas?

in today's world many people own a smartphone. do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

Many high school students take part time jobs. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.