Nowadays getting a job is becoming harder in poor countries leading to a rise in unemployment. Some people believe that pupils should only be allowed to access primary education while others believe that secondary education is necessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

"Knowledge is power". So,
education
plays a vital role in human's life.
However
, the motive behind seeking higher
education
is finding
a
Change the article
the
show examples
best
job
also
,
people
should be broad enough to accept the
job
, which comes to their ways when it is needed.
Moreover
, I strongly believe that
,
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apply
show examples
the schools and colleges are not only meant for providing
education
, perhaps, it
also
assist
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assists
show examples
the students to build a strong community.
This
essay will examine the topic in detail with relevant examples in the following paragraphs.
To begin
with, the individual should
understands
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understand
show examples
the purpose of studying. Because
,
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apply
show examples
humans
believes
Change the verb form
believe
show examples
that educational institutions are the ladder for reaching the higher professions. Indeed,
people
are going to universities only for hiring office jobs. It follows that, when they fail to achieve their dream
job
,
humans
may land up with
emotional
Add an article
the emotional
show examples
disturbance.
This
is because
people
are adding qualifications without understanding the real meaning of it. In short, every person should accept that,
education
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
the eyes, to helps
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
humans
to see the real world. To continue with,
people
are jobless because of their inferiority complex. To repeat, everyone wants to hold professional jobs, without understanding the exact fact that, workers in all the fields are equally important to build
beautiful
Correct article usage
a beautiful
show examples
society. To address
this
issue, the government should provide the same
importants
Correct your spelling
importance
important
to both the vocational and professional subjects.
Moreover
,
people
should be prepared themselves to accept any
job
to feed their family irrespective of their qualifications. All in all, it is
humans
hands to decide whether should be a
job
holder or not. To conclude,
education
is mandatory
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
everyone to lead a
stress free
Add a hyphen
stress-free
show examples
life in the competitive globe. So, I neither agree nor disagree with the point of leaving the school after primary or secondary
education
. It is the individual's choice to study. But, everyone should seek
atleast
Correct your spelling
at least
basic qualifications to have a healthy life.
Submitted by divyahemakumar2017 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • literacy and numeracy skills
  • competitive job market
  • advanced knowledge and skills
  • versatile workforce
  • higher education
  • specialized training
  • economic development
  • skilled workforce
  • foreign investors
  • social outcomes
  • reduced crime rates
  • quality of life
  • informed decisions
  • financial constraints
  • diluting resources
  • government role
  • accessible and equitable education
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