Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Parents always try to develop children’s personalities in many ways. There are predominantly two contrasting views where one class of the society vehemently deemed that younglings should spend their free
time
in the team activities while others think it is better to spend
moment
Add an article
a moment
show examples
alone. In
this
,
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
essay I will discuss both views and will tell my opinion that groups are more beneficial. Apparently,
this
class concentrate that spending moment with the team has a myriad benefit. Communication experience can be developed by friends. Is it true? Definitely yes! Humans are social animals so alone not possible to learn social finesse. If younglings spend
time
with the classmate in playing games, help in holistic development. Even
this
would be helpful in taking decisions during difficult situations. Team spirit is the most important attitude which can be developed only in the organization.
Furthermore
, children would learn patience, respect, collaboration, task achievement and immense qualities in the company because a supervisor stays there to observe and control them. To vindicate, in school those students who enjoy precious
time
with the schoolmates, develop wonderful social and communication proficiency.
On the contrary
, other fields of individuals believe that the young generation should give
time
to themselves. All are not equal in terms of personality and the thinking process due to that, can not be able to spend
time
with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
gang friends. Some of them are the introvert, so they prefer to live alone
instead
of with others. If a child is creative, he likes to give
time
to himself.
Such
children grasp lots of information alone. Do all the students utilise their
time
perfectly? Certainly not! Few younglings misuse their
time
watching movies, playing video games and surfing the internet. To conclude, both have their own merits and demerits. It is personal
choices
Fix the agreement mistake
choice
show examples
but ,
,
Change the punctuation
apply
show examples
personally
Add a comma
,personally
show examples
I prefer the association activities have a plethora of advantages
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
help to develop social and communication proficiency.
Submitted by namita.sinha25 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • encourage
  • occupied
  • organized
  • group activities
  • benefits
  • social
  • teamwork skills
  • interpersonal skills
  • friendship
  • discipline
  • time management
  • interests
  • hobbies
  • independent play
  • creativity
  • problem-solving skills
  • self-reliance
  • explore
  • discover
What to do next:
Look at other essays: