In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#countries #people #sum #money #railway #lines #trains #cities #transport

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Transportation is an essential means to convey people and goods from one place to another. Certain individuals in different nations state it is vital to use substantial capital for the construction of

railway

Use synonyms

station for extremely movable trains in urban areas while others suggest the money should be utilised on working on public transport that

are

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show examples

already in place. There are valid opinions on both sides which will

be discuss

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be discussed

show examples

in the essay below. At the forefront, those who believe that

huge

Correct article usage

a huge

show examples

sum of money should be earmark to build

railway

Use synonyms

lines point out

it's

Replace the word

its

show examples

significance. The increase in migration of people from rural areas to the cities

has

Add the particle

tohas

show examples

lead to

Change preposition

apply

show examples

over population

Correct your spelling

overpopulation

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thus

Linking Words

leading to high demand

Change preposition

for

show examples

transportation.

In addition

Linking Words

, building more

railway

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routes in city centres would

further

Linking Words

ease traffic congestion on the

road

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and emission of fossil gases in the atmosphere which would lead to global warming.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, safety and security

Change the verb form

are

show examples

quite certain for those plying on the

railway

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because it would be difficult for hoodlums to attack the passengers while the train is

Change preposition

show examples

motion

Add an article

the motion

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, due to cases of kidnapping and robbery attacks recorded on

road

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users using private or public vehicles.

Majority

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The majority

show examples

prefers to travel using

train

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the train

a train

show examples

In contrast

Linking Words

number

Change the article

a number

the number

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of persons opine that

such

Linking Words

an amount of money should be spent on improving the already existing mass transit. If there is

good

Correct article usage

a good

show examples

road

Use synonyms

network, transportation of several

commodity

Change to a plural noun

commodities

show examples

of goods from one locality to another would

would

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

be made easier and faster.

Also

Linking Words

, it would aid to generate revenue for the government as

Add an article

a tourist

show examples

tourist

Fix the agreement mistake

tourists

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from different countries would travel to explore the states by utilising

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

public transport.

Lastly

Linking Words

, it would

further

Linking Words

decrease accidents and

number

Correct article usage

the number

show examples

of damaged cars on the

road

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due to potholes and bad

condition

Fix the agreement mistake

conditions

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of the

road

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For instance

Linking Words

report

Add an article

a report

the report

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by Federal

Road

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Safety Commission,

suggest

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suggests

show examples

that 50% of accident cases would be reduced if current public transport is improved. Conclusively, in my opinion,

railway

Use synonyms

lines should be constructed in metropolitan cities because of safety reasons, reduction in traffic jams and it is faster.

Submitted by ndibeanasthesia on Tue Sep 14 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

348 words

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In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some school leavers tend to go for travelling or work for a period of time before directly going to university. What do you think are the advantages and disadvantages?

Q= Having police officer patrolling the streets is often considered an essential way to reduce crime. How effective do you think police Street patrolling are? What other ways to reduce crime can you purpose?

some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as many and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Many people today find they have insufficient time to spend with their families, because of pressures of work. What problems does this create for individuals and their families? What solutions can you propose? Which would be the most effective solution, in your view?