Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #prison #citizens #teenagers #dangers #crime

It is feasible that ex-prisoners can become normal and lead

productive

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a productive

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life

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lives

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. A chunk of

individual

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individuals

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

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point that, in order to discourage

juvenile

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juveniles

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from act crimes, they are the best people to give advice on prohibiting the lure of committing crimes whilst others are

skeptical

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sceptical

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about it. I,

however

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,however

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believe that there are better alternatives to warn teenagers about the drawbacks of executing

crime

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the crime

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To begin

with,

to encourage

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encouraging

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youth to live a life of

good

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a good

show examples

citizen is

hard

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a hard

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task. As

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apply

show examples

they have no control over their emotions, they are more prone to temptations which makes them vulnerable. One option would be for

police

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a police

the police

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officer

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officers

show examples

to visit

school

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schools

show examples

and talk to young children.

For instance

police

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a police

the police

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officer

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officers

show examples

can share stories of offenders when did in jail as they had broken the law.

Moreover

, it is evident that some criminals commit

crime

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crimes

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after their release from Jail so it is hard to say they have reformed, or they are merely appearing as novel individuals.

On the other hand

, it is true that ex-offenders can’t tell

teenager

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teenagers

show examples

how they involve in crime and the dangers of

criminal

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a criminal

the criminal

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lifestyle. As result, children will be discouraged to perform any

offense

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offence

show examples

and there are chances of them becoming

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

lawful

citizen

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citizens

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in the future.

Moreover

Teenager

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Teenagers

show examples

this

age

are

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show examples

highly

sensible

Replace the word

sensitive

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Hence

this

will affect them deeply which helps them to lead a positive life.

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conclusion, I do support the view that individuals who have turned their lives after serving prison

sentence

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sentences

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could help children stay away from committing crimes but I believe that the idea of using authority to deter school youth is more appropriate.

Submitted by jotjeet9 on Thu Sep 16 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

274 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

prisoners
rehabilitation
recidivism
consequences
insights
deterrent
guidance
support
role models
positive change

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Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Scientists agree that many people eat too much junk food and it is damaging their health. Some people think that this problem can be solved by educating people, while others believe that education will not work. Discuss both view and give your own opinion.

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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In many cities the population is increasing. Some say that the urbanization process denies us knowing our neighbors, and this causes a loss of community sense. What is the main problem with this? What measures can be taken to overcome it?

You are unable to attend the farewell party for your manager at work. Write a letter to him/her. In your letter: say why you can’t come tell them what you valued about working for him/her give him/her your best wishes.