Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others, however, believe that government should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #responsibility #individuals #care #health #diet #government #citizens

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Maintaining a healthy

lifestyle

Use synonyms

and diet is something that individuals need to be

catious

Correct your spelling

cautious

about,

although

Linking Words

many argue that governments

also

Linking Words

have a duty to ensure the public is obliging certain health etiquettes. As far as I am concerned, regulations could only encourage

people

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, while it is ultimately the

responsibilty

Correct your spelling

responsibility

of each person to look after their physical and mental well-being. On the one hand, governments could assist the public towards

Remove the article

apply

show examples

healthier nutrition through taxation on unhealthy foods, and subsidising fresh produce.

For instance

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McDonalds

Change to a genitive case

McDonald's

show examples

and other

fast food

Add a hyphen

fast-food

show examples

chains owe their popularity not only to how delicious their meals are but

also

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their affordable pricing.

Therefore

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, an increase in the price of

such

Linking Words

products could roll back its demand.

However

Linking Words

this

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tactic has proved itself wrong in the case of tobacco and alcohol in many countries. Many

people

Use synonyms

still smoke and drink regardless of the cost as they enjoy the addictive thrill once they are hooked consumption.

On the other hand

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, a health-conscious mindset is something that needs to be acquired at

individual

Add an article

the individual

an individual

show examples

level in order to become a

lifestyle

Use synonyms

model for

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apply

show examples

society. To illustrate, in recent years many have decided to exercise at gymnasiums and

consequently

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have become more aware and careful about their daily diets which obviously means spending more money

for

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show examples

their health.

Hence

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, it can be argued that once

people

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are willing to transform their

lifestyle

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, other factors

such

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as budgeting become of minor importance. In conclusion, there are opposing views on the topic of spreading a healthy

lifestyle

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and diet in a society. I believe that governments should only provide guidance for

people

Use synonyms

as persuasion works best, whereas

coersion

Correct your spelling

coercion

has shown to be obsolete.

Submitted by vandad1703 on Thu Sep 23 2021

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

282 words

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Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others, however, believe that government should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Many student choose to take a gap year before starting university, to travel or gain work experience. Do you think this is a good idea or a waste of time? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowadays, instead of locally sourced produce, many supermarkets sell a variety of foods imported from countries all over the world. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

In the past important knowledge and history were stored in the museum. Nowadays information is freely available on the Internet therefore is no longer a need for museums. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is it a negative or positive development? Give your explanation using some relevant examples from your experience.

More and more people are working from rather than at the workplace. Some people say this will bring benefits to the workers and their families, but others think it will bring stress to the home. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.