Some systems require students to specialize in a limited range of subjects from the age of fifteen. Other systems require students to study a wide range of subjects until they leave school. What are the benefits of these two education systems and which is better?

In modern society, some people assert that focusing on a limited range of
subjects
is efficient for
students
aged over 15. Whereas, others insist that
students
should be taught various
subjects
at
school
until they graduate from
school
. These opposing beliefs provoke controversy among the public in today's society. The following paragraphs will represent the merits of two arguments and my view about
this
topic.
To begin
with, it is apparent that specializing in few
subjects
is highly likely to save time and make desired consequences.
This
is because every student has different interests and dreams, they don't need to
study
all compulsory
subjects
like Math, Science, History and English.
Thus
, the
school
should allow
students
to decide to
study
only several
subjects
that their dreams are linked to.
For instance
,
although
some of the
students
are good at painting and hope to spend more session hours attending art class,
school
forces them to
study
other mandatory by ignoring their talent and interests.
This
education system could have detrimental effects on student's future in the long term.
Thus
, only investing a number of hoped
subjects
can make
students
go-ahead
Correct your spelling
go ahead
show examples
with their dreams as well as increase their morale during the class.
On the other hand
, studying a wide range of
subjects
can help
students
broaden their perspective and gain fundamental and formative knowledge in various fields. The reason why is that mandatory
subjects
include basic and important
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
in general. learning
such
basic
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
must be a valuable asset to survive in
competitive
Correct article usage
a competitive
show examples
era.
Thus
, If
students
do not learn about
such
subjects
at
school
, they could have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
difficult
Replace the word
difficulty
show examples
to work or
communite
Correct your spelling
communicate
community
with others after graduating from
school
.
For example
,
students
who do not pay attention to math classes at all,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
could experience that they make mistakes about calculation at
workplace
Add an article
the workplace
show examples
. Taken together, I think these two different education
system
Change the determiner
systems
show examples
have each advantage. From my view, I believe that
students
need to attend all given classes during
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school
time.
This
is because the future is not predictable, it is better to
study
a wide range of
subjects
.
Hence
, studying all
subjects
at
school
could suggest diverse possibilities in future.
Submitted by jin960524 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: