IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Games are as important for adult as they are for children. Do you agree or disagree with this statement

#games #adult #children
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It is undeniable that the predominance of
games
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 in
people
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's daily life.some folk vocalize that
games
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 are pivotal not only in
juvenils
Correct your spelling
juveniles
juvenile
 but
also
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majure
Change preposition
in majure
show examples
 persons.I agree with
this
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 notion and I will explain some agreement points in the forthcoming paragraphs.
To begin
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 with, there are myriad supporting reasons, why
games
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 are significant to both
adults
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 and minors.
Firstly
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, playing
games
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 are the best way to reduce stress and enlarge the mental
health
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 of every person. Nowadays, children, as well as young
man
Fix the agreement mistake
men
show examples
,
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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 young men are busy with their hectic life because to achieve ideal things in life. Grown persons are stressed with academics while
,
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apply
show examples
adults
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 are engaged in employment-related activities so spend
time
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 for
games
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 are crucial.
For example
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, a survey was conducted
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 20
adults
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 and 20 children
shows
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show
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, who has found
time
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 for
games
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 has the lowest stress and operative.
Moreover
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,
games
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 assist enhance the ability to win particular
task
Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
show examples
 so youngsters and minors could showcase their talent
in
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particular
Add an article
a particular
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 arena.
Furthermore
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, outdoor activities are the best avenue to improve
health
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 in
people
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 so it is elementary to everyone rather than a particular age. If
adults
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 spend
time
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 for
games
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, they will become more active and could keep maintaining youth. For evidence,
people
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, who have spent
time
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 on
games
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has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 fewer
health
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 issues and they seem to be healthy. One of my uncles tries to find at least one hour for playing
games
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 so that he has seen more energetic in every age. To conclude,
although
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games
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 are
time
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-consuming, it's beneficial for both the mental and
health
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 wealth of every person
instead
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 of age. It is predicting that
people
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 should find some
time
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 to engage in
games
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 to achieve a healthy lifestyle.
Submitted by Shalushiva6582 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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