Some claim that men are naturally more competitive than women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is a stereotype that
men
are genetically more competitive than
women
. In
this
essay, I will
show
that both sexes are equally competitive though in different spheres. On one hand,
men
seem to have various genetic predispositions to being competitive. One of the
first
arguments
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
supporting
this
claim is that
men
have a tendency to act more aggressively compared to
women
as males have a higher level of testosterone. Increased
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
show examples
of
this
hormone can be explained by the fact that historically
men
had to battle with one another and other creatures in order to survive and gain dominance in society. In the modern world,
men
do not have to physically battle anyone, in order to survive they have transferred
this
aggression into ambition which drives them to excel
their
Change preposition
in their
show examples
skills in the chosen sphere. Since
men
do not have to be physically engaged in battles for survival in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern time, they have challenged
this
aggression into work, which aids them in
exceling
Correct your spelling
excelling
their skills in the chosen sphere.
However
, there are those that believe
otherwise
. It can be said that the claim above completely ignores the fact that
women
can simply have other interests and
show
their competitiveness in other fields. Unfortunately, historically it was set that
women
who showed
passion
Add an article
a passion
show examples
for competitive sports and ambitious careers were discouraged and even shamed for
such
desires. Gender equality achieved in the past century led to the fact that
women
can embrace their competitive drive and
endeavor
Change the spelling
endeavour
show examples
their goals on the same level as
men
.
Although
it was the only shift of innate desires that were already present in females being shown publicly without
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
judgement. Unlike males,
women
could only
show
their competitiveness
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
and focus on domestic matters rather than respectable work activities. Maintaining a household might not seem to be a competitive environment,
nonetheless
,
women
had to compete against each other to deem as the best housewife and marry a well-off man in order to achieve
highest
Add an article
a highest
the highest
show examples
possible position in society at the time. In conclusion, despite historical evidence of
more
Correct article usage
the more
show examples
competitive nature of
men
,
this
claim is oversimplified and does not take into account the historical limitations of
women
and their interests in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Hence
, I believe that both genders are equal in
this
area, yet females
show
it more subtly.
Submitted by urunova7777 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: