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"Some people believe that adults get motivated to exercise and play sports because of the major sports events on TV such as the Olympic Games and Football World Cup. Others say that there are many ways apart from TV to encourage them to exercise. Discuss both views and give your own opinion."

#people #adults #exercise #sports #events #tv #olympic #games #football #world #cup
A few people
asserts
Change the verb form
assert
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 that youngsters should watch sports
TV
 programs to get
motivation
Add an article
the motivation
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 to participate in sports but on other
hand
Add a comma
,hand
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 some people believe many other activities are possible to encourage them to exercise.
This
 essay will illustrate both views.
First
 of all, watching sportsmen on
TV
 how they make their nation proud worldwide, encourage adults to take participate in games and make their country proud too.
For instance
, Virat Kohli an Indian cricketer inspired
from
Change preposition
by
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 famous cricketer Sachin Tendulkar by watching his matches on
TV
 and wants to become like him so he started playing cricket in childhood.
Secondly
, watching sports on
TV
 gives all information about game rules. It becomes
more easy
Replace the words
easier
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 to learn
Correct article usage
the rule
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rule
Fix the agreement mistake
rules
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 and techniques of games by watching others. On the
others
Correct pronoun usage
other
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 hand,
instead
 of television shows, physical education from schools encourage
student
Add an article
the student
a student
show examples
 to participate in games.
For example
, if schools encourage students to participate in school
competition
Fix the agreement mistake
competitions
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 with proper training and appreciation there are more chances they will become good players in future. To summarize,
although
 students can be encouraged if taught from schools
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
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in my opinion watching
tv
 shows helps them to participate more with their own wish.
Submitted by harryhundal30 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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