Some countries are struggling with the increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do you agree?

#countries #rate #crime #people #police #streets

A few countries are facing security's issues which led the

crime

rate

clamb

Correct your spelling

climb

. There

are

Change the verb form

show examples

a consensus

who

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

believes that having more police's force

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show examples

the city is the only way to control the

crime

rate

. I completely agree that having forces

distrubated

Correct your spelling

distributed

around the

street

would drop the

crime

rate

Firstly

, behaviourally speaking,

this

act would make people

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apply

show examples

be more alert

secondly

, it will

sedates

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sedate

show examples

citizens in that

street

. The main reason why I believe that having agents in the area would

decreace

Correct your spelling

decrease

the overall of crimes is

because

Replace the word

that

show examples

this

would trigger people that there is someone is watching them. In fact,

behavioual

Correct your spelling

behavioural

scienctists

Correct your spelling

scientists

deduced that when someone knew that

themselves

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

are watched

this

might

made

Wrong verb form

make

show examples

them

Change the verb form

apply

show examples

be more aware.

Moreover

, one of the city's

council

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councils

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put a sign that

this

street

is had been watching and there are tons of

camera

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cameras

show examples

;

as a result

, the

crime

rate

had dropped by %87. Another reason why I think that having the police in the

street

would lower any issue

realted

Correct your spelling

to security is

because

Replace the word

that

show examples

it will

sends

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send

show examples

messages to citizens that everything is under control.

Also

this

might not

sedates

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sedate

show examples

citizen

Fix the agreement mistake

citizens

show examples

only, but it might

sedates

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sedate

show examples

foreginer

Correct your spelling

foreigner

foreigners

who dropped by there. Despite the fact that it will send gleeful messages to the people

this

might be the opposite for the criminals.

Oviously

Correct your spelling

Obviously

, when a

crimnal

Correct your spelling

criminal

knows that the

minstery

Correct your spelling

ministry

mystery

of interior sent agents in the

street

this

might make criminals

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apply

show examples

have

Remove the article

apply

show examples

second guessing

Add a hyphen

second-guessing

show examples

. In conclusion, I strongly admit that sending police's forces in the area would drop the

crime

rate

this

is because of the watching biases and it will

makes

Change the verb form

make

show examples

a criminal

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

have

Remove the article

apply

show examples

second guessing

Add a hyphen

second-guessing

show examples

. I do believe that

to have

Change the verb form

having

show examples

more agents in the

street

is not a bad idea.

Submitted by kofaisal on Tue Nov 02 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

299 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some countries are struggling with the increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do you agree?

Fully explain your ideas

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