IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by fast food. This has a negative impact on families, individuals and societies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #foods #food #impact #families #individuals #societies
Nowadays, the newer generation is more interested in fast
food
 than their native
food
 items.
This
 particular adaptation is not just detrimental for families but individuals and societies as
whole
Correct article usage
a whole
show examples
 too. I totally agree with
this
 statement as losing interest in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
traditional
food
 may detach them from their culture. In the forthcoming paragraphs, I shall explain my point of view. Undoubtedly, junk foods are regarded as one of the preferred meals of the majority of people.
However
,
this
 type of diet is least suggested by health advisors and dieticians.
Also
, these
food
 products and beverages are liable for a gamut of emerging diseases, obesity being one of them.
For instance
, burgers and pizzas have a humongous amount of fat. Despite being scrumptious, they can lead to an increase in weight, resulting in negative impacts on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
health. Traditional
food
 comprises a balanced amount of vitamins, proteins, and more
such
 essential nutrients, which are essential for us to consume and be active and fit.
Thus
, these types of
food
 items keep us away from unwanted diseases and help us be more productive while keeping dizziness and lethargy at bay. Not to mention, the spices and other ingredients available in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Indian
food
 contain a variety of medicinal properties that safeguard our immune system.
For instance
, having a glass of milk with turmeric once a day can do wonders for our
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
show examples
. Despite all the advantages, I am
also
 aware of the other side of the story as fast
food
 items are quick to be prepared and don’t consume a lot of time. Wrapping it up, it is evident that our priority should be to stay healthy and active while refraining from indulging in
such
 activities that may cause trouble and stress. For
this
 specific reason, going with traditional
food
 rather than unhealthy, fast
food
 should be the
first
 priority.
Submitted by par206 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: