Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent times, people are getting more and more professionally competitive,
this
Linking Words
has resulted in cutthroat competition
accross
Correct your spelling
across
the industries. To achieve career success in their lives, they are more inclined towards extended working
hours
Use synonyms
,
hence
Linking Words
lesser
tim
Change the capitalization
Tim
time
show examples
eis
Correct your spelling
is
dedicated
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
hobbies and other rejuvenating activities. I will discuss both the pros and the cons in the below paragraphs.
To begin
Linking Words
with, there are several advantages of long working
hours
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, students who are starting their career, need to give more
time
Use synonyms
for better understanding and executing their job responsibilities. Being a fresher, they are
competiting
Correct your spelling
competing
with experience staff
hence
Linking Words
they have to put in an extra effort to match with their existing colleagues.
secondly
Linking Words
, for
result oriented
Add a hyphen
result-oriented
show examples
employees ,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
always try to complete their assigned task before
given
Add an article
the given
show examples
deadline, to be in
good
Add an article
the good
show examples
book of their supervisor, which many a
time
Use synonyms
require longer
hours
Use synonyms
of works.
For example
Linking Words
, many organisations hire management trainees from different business schools but only
few
Change the article
a few
show examples
successed
Correct your spelling
succeed
succeeded
in
Linking Words
first
Change the article
the first
show examples
year of their employment in meeting company
expectation
Fix the agreement mistake
expectations
show examples
but for those who meet
this
Linking Words
, one of the
pillar
Change to a plural noun
pillars
show examples
of their success is the
extar
Correct your spelling
extra
time
Use synonyms
they put
in to
Correct your spelling
into
show examples
deliver
Wrong verb form
delivering
show examples
their assignment accurately.
However
Linking Words
,
on the other hand
Linking Words
,there are
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
drawback
Change to a plural noun
drawbacks
show examples
of the extended working
hours
Use synonyms
.
First
Linking Words
of all,it results in escalating health problems of the employees.
Now a days
Correct the word
Nowadays
show examples
,
disease
Fix the agreement mistake
diseases
show examples
like obesity, blood pressure
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
, body aches etc. are common in most of the staff
expose
Change the form of the verb
exposed
show examples
to overtime working.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
also
Linking Words
affect
Change the verb form
affects
show examples
the personal
life
Use synonyms
of the peoples as they are not able to spend quality
time
Use synonyms
with their family members. Due to
this
Linking Words
, many a
time
Use synonyms
they dissolve their
mariage
Correct your spelling
marriage
and
pefer
Correct your spelling
prefer
to live an independent
life
Use synonyms
. To conclude, people should be ambitious and career-oriented in their
life
Use synonyms
, but at the same
time
Use synonyms
should not forget to take out free
time
Use synonyms
for themselves and their families.
This
Linking Words
will
definately
Correct your spelling
definitely
help them to lead a healthy and happy
life
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by saurab.choursasia on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • mental well-being
  • burnout
  • stress relief
  • productivity
  • economic growth
  • career progression
  • skill enhancement
  • quality time
  • financial security
  • leisure activities
  • physical health
  • personal relationships
  • stress-related illnesses
What to do next:
Look at other essays: