IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some People think one should stay all their life in the same job, whereas others advocate changing jobs from time to time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #life #job #advocate #jobs #time
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Undoubtedly, change is the law of nature.
However
,
this
 became a debatable issue whether or not
one
 should have to try new opportunity because, some folks opin that it's really good to explore new
work
 environment while
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 others give importance to
work
 at
one
place
. I will Discuss both these views along with my perspective. On
one
 hand, some individual's
prefer
Add the particle
toprefer
show examples
 continue to
work
 at
regular
Add an article
a regular
show examples
place
 as it's very convenient to
work
 there because employees know very well about their colleagues and owner as they found it difficult to adjust
in
Change preposition
to
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new
Correct article usage
a new
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work space
Correct your spelling
workspace
show examples
.
Moreover
, some Masses
scared
Add a missing verb
are scared
show examples
 to lose
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
 for the searching
of
Change preposition
for
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new
Add an article
a new
the new
show examples
one
Fix the agreement mistake
ones
show examples
.
For instance
, my co-worker told me that she is working at the same
place
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 18 years because she is not feeling confident to explore new
work
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
 and staff.
On the other hand
,some people really like to change their
work
 with the passage of time, as they want to take different
job
 responsibilities and
ofcourse
Correct your spelling
of course
 to earn more money. In
this
 modern era, mostly the young generation is looking towards the bright future as
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
 desires are more so, they always acception highly paid jobs.
Moreover
, it
also
enhance
Change the verb form
enhances
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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knowledge as people get the chance to explore new items through
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
job
. In
conclude
Replace the word
conclusion
show examples
,
although
 working at the old
place
 is more comfortable but, I personally believe that
try
Wrong verb form
trying
show examples
 new
job
 makes a person happy.
Besides
this
, they will get a chance to learn something new and unique.
Submitted by gurbinderkaur515 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • job security
  • stability
  • financial insecurity
  • expertise
  • advance their careers
  • promotions
  • pay raises
  • recognition
  • personal and professional growth
  • work environments
  • responsibilities
  • skill set
  • adaptability
  • job satisfaction
  • mental health
  • stuck
  • stagnant
  • lucrative
  • job offers
  • commitment
  • instability
  • retirement plans
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