You have learned that a financial organisation in your city gives money as a loan to students who like to take a part-time course. You are interested to do the course and have decided to take a loan. Write a letter to a local financial organisation. In your letter, • give your qualifications and work experience • give details about the course • explain how this course will help you

#organisation #city #money #loan #students #course #qualifications #work

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing

this

letter to receive more detailed information regarding a loan for students or employees who would like to be enrolled in a course which has been recently announced by your bank on a local business radio show.

Last

year I graduated from Durham University in London where I obtained a bachelor degree in Physics. Since my

graduation

Add a comma

,graduation

show examples

I have been working as a Physical education teacher in ABC boarding school. I have gained valuable insights in teaching disabled adolescents and now I

also

am interested in studying child psychology. Every year in spring Durham University conducts a course which is based on the subject of psychology concerning children. They offer a comprehensive six-month-long curriculum intended to obtain basic knowledge in

this

field along with one-month practice in a children hospital. Being a teacher in the

center

Change the spelling

centre

show examples

where I work requires me to have some basic understanding of children’s mindset;

therefore

I am confident that studying in Durham will provide me with essential information which I could apply during my work duties. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, Zara Martin

Submitted by aigulziatdinova29 on Sat Nov 13 2021

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

189 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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