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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

the information about male’s proportion participants in senior development position in three various companies in six different years with five years interval, starting from 1980.

The given bar chart illustrates the information about male’s proportion participants in senior development positions in
three
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 various
companies
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 in six different years with five years interval, starting from 1980. Overall, there was an upward trend of men participating in
three
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companies
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.
Furthermore
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, the most significant difference in the figures between the
three
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companies
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 was in 2010. According to the chart, it can be seen that in 1980, Apple
company
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 represented the highest figure for man senior development position,approximately 15%.
This
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 was followed by
Microsoft
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company
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, just under 10%; IBM
company
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, only 2% which was the least amount of
three
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companies
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. After a decade,
this
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 rate of the apple
company
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 dropped slightly.
On the contrary
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, the proportion of the
Microsoft
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company
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 went up minimally, while it gradually increased for the IBM
company
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 which it surpassed the figure for
Microsoft
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company
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.
Moreover
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, with a similar sharp acceleration of the rate of the IBM,Between 1995 and 2010, its amount reached more than 60%, making it the most man staff in that position. There was a similar increase for the
Microsoft
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company
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, rising from just over 10% in 1995 to over 40% in 2010.
Although
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 the figure for The Apple
company
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 experienced a mere fall in 2000, it rose slightly to approximately 25% in 2010.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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