Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Most of the groceries that we consume every day have a high level of
sugar
and
this
amount
of
sugar
cause numerous diseases. Overall ,some
people
believe that increasing the
cost
of these
products
can encourage
people
to buy them lower. In my point of view,
this
is a good way but it is not so efficient. Our society
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
been faced with a big problem which is obesity.
This
illness can cause numerous problems like diabetes or cardiovascular disease. The problem is that
people
in
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apply
show examples
all
of
Change preposition
over
show examples
the world are using a high
amount
of
sugar
without a specific diet. In
this
way,
people
become fat and a fat person not only cannot exercise well, but
also
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
face with some health issue.
Sugar
products
are very delicious and
people
want to buy and consume them. There are some ways that we can stop
this
problem.
In
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On
show examples
one
Correct article usage
the one
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hand, we can compel companies to soar their product's
cost
,
however
, it has some problems, Food producers are making money
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
selling their
products
and forcing them to
rise
Correct your spelling
raise
show examples
their
Change to a genitive case
the cost of their products
the cost of their product
show examples
products
cost
can make them angry because
higher
Add an article
the higher
show examples
cost
of a product can lead to lower benefits.
Moreover
, some
people
will buy anything they need without paying attention to its
cost
.
On the other hand
, governments can act better to decrease the
amount
of
sugar
consuming
Replace the word
consumption
show examples
. They must teach everybody that they should eat a lower
amount
of
sugar
to keep their health condition stable. Governments should use their power in social media or pass some rules to teach
people
. If every
individuals
Change to a singular noun
individual
show examples
learn what is a healthy diet, they would not use sugary foods anymore. One of the successful efforts of governments to teach
people
is using seat belts. When
people
found that it is vital for their survival, they used it. In conclusion, I suppose that teaching
people
to have a healthy diet can be more efficient than the other ways.
Submitted by mohamadamin1376 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • health problems
  • manufactured food and drink products
  • sugary products
  • excessive sugar consumption
  • discourage
  • promote
  • healthier choices
  • reduce
  • increased taxes
  • fund
  • health education
  • prevention programs
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