In education and employment, some people work harder than others. Why do some people work harder? Is it always a good thing to work hard?

#education #employment #people #work

In many workplaces, it is easy to spot some individuals who have a tendency to

work

more than t

he o

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

thers. In my opinion, there are many reasons for

this

phenomenon, and it brings both h

arms

Fix the agreement mistake

harm

show examples

and benefits. There are two main reasons why some

people

work

harder than t

he o

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

thers.

Firstly

, they might have a higher demand for i

ncomes.

Fix the agreement mistake

income

show examples

They rather have a higher cost of living in comparison with normal workers or have more

people

to feed in their family.

This

has forced some individuals to

work

extra hours in order to have a better payment to meet their extra needs.

Secondly

, some persons have more passion to strive for success. These persons

work

for better certification, higher income, better position and better living s

tandard.

Fix the agreement mistake

standards

show examples

Therefore

, they’re willing to do extra works and projects that are beneficial to their career development. In fact, being a h

ard-worker

Correct your spelling

hard worker

show examples

can have both positive and negative effects on a person’s life. On one hand, working harder gives a person more working experience and provides them better job opportunities. It

also

helps to improve their family living standard in the modern age where the cost of food and drinks is rising gradually.

Furthermore

, i

ncrease

Wrong verb form

increasing

show examples

a person’s income motivates them to think about more ambitious choices, which improve their living enjoyment.

However

, the downside when a person

ork

Change the verb form

works

show examples

harder is the restriction of their time for other activities. Investing too much time in their jobs can prevent

people

from participating o

utdoor

Change preposition

in outdoor

show examples

and indoor exercises.

This

sedentary lifestyle will have a negative effect on a person’s health condition, both physically and mentally. They will be more likely to suffer from diseases like obesity, n

ear-sighted

Replace the word

near-sightedness

show examples

and mental issues

such

as depression.

Therefore

, it is important for a person to balance the amount of time for working and relaxing, in order to enjoy their life the most In conclusion, some

people

work

harder in order to have a better living standard.

However

, it is not always beneficial to be a workaholic.

Submitted by Andy on Sun Nov 28 2021

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

333 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Genetic predisposition
Work ethic
Upbringing
Cultural values
Ambitions
Motivated
Fear of failure
Competitive nature
Overworking
Burnout
Stress-related health issues
Productivity
Quality of life
Healthy balance
Long-term productivity

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In education and employment, some people work harder than others. Why do some people work harder? Is it always a good thing to work hard?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Small town center shops are running out of business because rural residents tend to go shopping in big cities store. To what extent do the disadvantages of this development outweigh the advantages?

Some people think that governments should give financial support to creative artists such as painters and musicians. Others believe that creative artists should be funded by alternative sources. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.